Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Over the past few days the college sports landscape has drastically changed. The Pac 10 now has 11 teams and almost certainly 12 by the end of the month. The Big Ten has 12 teams and the Big 12 has ten teams. None of the names make any sense anymore so it's time they were renamed and I figure, I'm a bright guy, I can come up with the perfect new names for each of these conferences.
Pac 10 -> CoCWoRM
The Pac 10 is kind of going to ways of the ACC and grabbing at landlocked schools who are no longer on the Coast line, so it needs something a little bit more accurate. Thus, CoCWoRM is the perfect choice. CoCWoRM can stand for Conference of Colleges West of the Rocky Mountains (or River Mississippi). It also seems like a very suitable name for the shady dealings that have gone on recently both in the Conference landscape, the fact they were trying to eat up the entire Big 12, as well as in the USC scandals.
Big 12 -> Texas & Friends
The Big 12 has ten teams so keeping that name is completely out of the question. The new name should really reflect who actually has all the power in the conference and the school that decided that the conference would not fold, and that is Texas. The conference and ESPN have already placated Texas with ample dollar signs in TV revenue and its own station so why not just go all the way and name the entire conference after them.
Big 10 -> COC 12
This is my least favorite of the new names and has ample room for improvement but it needs to reflect the fact that all of these teams used to be better than they are now and thus we currently have the COC 12 (Completely Overrated Conference 12). It's obviously too close to the CoCWoRM, which I like better, but it will suffice for now.