So I’m sitting there peacefully watching TV on Monday night, when I receive the following IM from my buddy Hank: “Turn on Raw right now, Stone Cold is about to stun someone.” Or something like that. Now, slightly pathetically, this got me about as excited as any IM possibly could have, with the exception of anything from JsImPsOn69. Stone Cold was the main reason I watched wrestling for as long as I did, him and the sweet ass of Fabulous Moolah of course, God rest her soul. To hear that he was back would be like hearing that Tom Brady was coming out of retirement 20 years from now to lead the Pats back to glory.So of course I changed the channel to Raw, and proceeded to watch Austin lay down a textbook stunner, go backstage and drive a Budweiser truck down to the ring, pull a fire hose out of the truck, and hose down not only the chump that he stunned, but the impossibly hot broad that was with said chump. All the while Hank and I were exchanging IMs like a couple of 12 year old school girls. Austin then proceeded to pull his classic, “Get two Buds tossed to him, open them, smash them together and pour the remains all over himself,” routine about 16 times, including on top of the truck. Not to mention the fact that they kept playing his music the entire time. If you don’t get goose bumps every time the glass shatters at the beginning of Stone Cold Steve Austin’s music, you may want to go to the doctor and make sure you’re alive.
I haven’t watched wrestling in a long time, but I’ll be damned if I’m missing a second of The Rattlesnake.
Also, mucho props to Simon for plugging my marathon adventure, and for the downright hilarious pic of a running bear that he managed to find. It is now the official photo on my fundraising website.
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