The Neutral Fans Plight

Oh who to root for on Sunday. I'm not a fan of either team and I have spent the past decade disliking both teams. How do I break this down and choose which hated squad to lean towards come sunday? Is it possible to watch a game and be completely neutral? Should I be immoral and root for dual QB injuries?

Which Coach To Hate More?

Annoying Sweatshirt Toter: Genius. Enough of the Genius. I can't root for anything Belichick, he pulled a Nick Saban on the Jets leading to a year with bumbling idiot Al Groh and its been completely forgotten. Success does that, overshadows any negatives or character flaws.

The Losers Face: Come on how funny are the faces of Tony Dungy and Peyton Manning after the big playoff failure. Tony Dungy looks like a sad puppy on the sidelines when Vanderweenie used to miss big field goals, imagine what he'll look like if Vinatieri misses a big time field goal.

Which QB To Hate More?

Enough of the Dreamboat: If you're not a Pats fan how could you root for Tom Brady? Hasn't he had enough friggin success already? 3 Superbowls, constant comparisons to Joe Montana and the greatest quarterbacks of all time, dated hot ass Bridget Moynahan for years and is now rumoured to have Gisele all over him? Guys got everything any man could ever desire, and you want to root for him to get more? So what if he's classy and says all the right things, so does Derek Jeter, that doesn't stop the majority of baseball fans from wishing him failure, how is Brady any different? Tons of championships (3 to 4), hot girlfriends (Gisele to Jessica Biel), these guys have enough they don't need neutral fans pulling for them.

Hilarity of Peyton's Failures: I don't know about you but I find the whole Peyton Manning can never succeed in a big spot quite humurous. Why root for him to come through against the Pats? Will you not find humor in a 3 interception performance? Perhaps it's my dislike for all things University of Tennessee, but I found it funny when Peyton couldn't beat the Gators, resulting in quotes like "You Can't Spell Citrus without UT" from Spurrier, and I find it funny how poorly he performs in the big spot in the pros.

Every Ad a Peyton Ad: So Peyton Manning already seems like he's in every Ad during a football game, and thats as a proven playoff loser. What kind of apocolyptic ratio of Peyton to non Peyton Ads on sunday afternoons be once he wins a Superbowl? His image might as well be laser engraved into your retinas.

The Best Ever Debate

Pats Trifecta: If the Pats win this Superbowl they will lay clame to being the greatest dynasty in Football history and Bill Belichick will anchor himself into the position of greatest coach ever. This would make me vomit. Atleast now you could make the case for the 90s Cowboys or 70s Steelers, but a 4th Superbowl in the this era of the NFL, easily puts the Pats over the top and would add another reason for myself to vacate New England. If Brady wins a 4th Superbowl that puts him as the greatest playoff quarterback of all time, bar none. And he's still got plenty of years to position himself as the greatest QB of all time, come on. Where's the Monster Truck when you need it?

Best QB Ever: Do you really want Peyton Manning one step closer to that Best QB Ever Tag? Honestly? He's choked in pretty much every big spot his entire college and pro career. Hell Tee Martin won the National Championship right after Peyton went to the pros. If he wins a the AFC Championship game are you prepared for a Sportscenter Segment everyday surrounding Peyton's credentials as greatest of all time? I know I'm not.

The Final Decision

In a Dreamworld: A Natural Disaster eliminating both teams would solve all of these issues.

Go NFC Well the conclusion is that I don't care who wins this game, too many negatives on both sides for my to choose. Perhaps I'll just root for whichever team goes down in the first half and just hope for a good game. But I do know that come February 4th I will be rooting for the Bears or Saints with all my might.