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11 Things I Lerndid Whiles in da Souf


I'm back from my vacation, so let's get the party rolling...

1. Southerners love to pollute. Why when the rest of America is concerned with keeping shit green should Southerners give a crap. Hell no, there will be no recycling and no emission testing in Bama.

2. Beaches in Mississippi and Bama suck just as badly as beaches in Connecticut. Sure the waters warmer but again Southerners like to pollute more, so why would they have fucking trash cans on their beach when they can just leave the trash right there on the sand. Thanks Biloxi.

3. No one likes UAB, my lovely girlfriend is working at Champs Sports Medicine at St. Vincents in Birmingham (home of James Andrews) and its literally on University Blvd. blocks away from UAB. Yet, the entire time I was down there I didn't see a single piece of UAB Apparel, rather all Bama and Auburn stuff. Hell the gift shop in the hospital only had Bama and Auburn stuff.

4. Birmingham likes murders. There were 5 this past weekend. Woo, excitement.

5. 18 Wheelers can drive 95 miles per hour in a straight line no problem.

6. There isn't nearly enough Cajun & Barbecue food in the North. I'll take Jambalaya, Crawfish Etouffee, or a pulled pork sandwhich over the boring shit we have up here any day.

7. Massive Confederate flags flying on the side of the Highway are so cool.

8. Other than Bourbon St. I can't say that I thought there were a ton of things to do in New Orleans. I did think that eating beignets (essentially fried dough with massive amounts of sugar) was a must. And we did enjoy going to a Plantation.

9. All the tours of New Orleans include exclusive looks of the devastation of Katrina. So it takes you to where the buildings are all run down. (Not like you have to go very far). I guess anything for a buck.

10. Normally I'm a straight beer man. But on Bourbon Street it's a must to pound at least one Hurricane, Daiquiri, and Hand Grenade.

11. Being in New Orleans during the Essence Festival made me quite the minority.

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