So I traveled up to Mass this weekend to booze it up with my college buddies. I won one dominating game of horseshoes (Clarky is good), I broke one patio chair leg and carried it around like it was a Preying Mantis leg, I was probably incredibly annoying to everyone involved, and then I passed out on a sofa most likely before everyone else, all an all a mediocre to poor showing by myself but still a good time.
But on to what pissed me off this weekend, the Mass Pike. So I'm heading up on saturday afternoon and I'm making beautiful time, driving about 85 the entire way until all of a sudden I get on the Mass Pike and within a mile I'm in bumper to bumper traffic. Because I am completely impatient this pisses me off to no end. Eventually leading me to just drop F bombs at the top of my lungs for no other reason then I'm pissed off and want to move.
So of course what always peaks my interest is what stupid shit garnered this traffic. Could it be someone pulled off on the side of a road? Perhaps a truck (that lead to massive traffic on 84 on my voyage home). Could it actually be a decent accident which deserves traffic backed up. Is it something dumb like they decided to just drop the highway from 3 to 2 lanes to do construction?
No it was none of the above. It was a f*ing lane split. Aka the fast lane had to veer to the left an additional 10 ft and the two lanes on the right moved a couple of feet over and there was a portion of the road in between blocked off. This road split last for about 30 yards. So it was nothing, absolutely nothing, you had to move your god damn car over 10 ft for about 10 seconds of driving and then it cleared up right after that. So essentially I was in 35 minutes of stop and go traffic because some assclown needed to break because they need to move their car 10 feet to the left and created a clusterf*ck of traffic. I hope you sir got food poisoning or someone pulled an Oklahoma nut grab on you. You dirt bag.
And but of course the same shit happened on the way home. Another 35 minutes of my life thrown down the crapper cause the Mass Pike blows. Ugh...
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