Skip to main content

What Sport Would Sonic the Hedgehog Play?

What Sport is a series of posts dedicated to figuring out what sport a certain fictional character would play. Today's topic is Sonic the Hedgehog.

Description: Sonic the Hedgehog is a little animal who for some reason is fast as hell. How little is Sonic? He's listed at 39 inches, so much like Mega Man the Tall Guy sports are out. But unlike Mega Man, Sonic isn't really that tough, it just takes two hits in a row to knock him out for the count so the physical sports might take a hit as well.

The Options: Sonic is just too short and small to play any of the physical sports or tall guy sports so football, rugby, hockey, bball and vball are out. He also doesn't have the wingspan to generate speed for a "Swing" sport, so tennis, golf, and baseball are out. So what the hell is left? Track obviously, but that's a boring answer and is running really a sport? So I guess its time to focus on sports with little physical contact where speed is key.

Soccer: We're back to the Lionel Messi point of short guys being good at soccer, but it really just takes a couple of body blows to knock Sonic out. Plus he's so small and so fast his teammates would likely never be able to see him to pass the ball. Sure he might be able to dribble around everyone but this doesn't seem ideal.

Ultimate Frisbee: It's like football with little to no contact. The problem with this sport is that while speed will get you open to catch the frisbee, in many cases jump catches are needed and given the fact Sonic is just 39 inches, he won't be able to take it away from the trees.

Capture the Flag: Sure this sport is really only used in camps for little kids but god damn this is the ideal sport for Sonic. He's so small that opponents would have nearly an impossible time seeing him enter their zone and he's so fast that he could easily meander his way back with the opponents flag and take home the trophy every time.

The Verdict: Capture the Flag, this was a no brainer.

Disagree? Feel Free to Blast Away in the Comments.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!

Numbers On Steroids: Bret Boone

Numbers on Steroids is a look at baseball players during the 90s to see if anything screams out at you. Mr. Boone was once the best power hitting second baseman in the league. How questionable was his success? Averages Say: Why the extra plateu in his mid 30s? At Bats Per Home Run Says: Lowest at Bats Per Home Runs at 37? Hmm.... Explaining It Away Yeak, this one is tough. Umm, late bloomer? He showed potential power early in his career and he just liked playing in Seattle a lot more than everywhere else? And umm, his career was kind of like a running backs in that it just all of a sudden fell off the map? Any of these convincing you? The Verdict Guy never hits more than 24 home runs in a season and then in his age 32 season he hits 37? And in SafeCo a pitchers park to boot? And he follows that up with 24, 35, 24 homer years still at SafeCo? And then he completely falls off the map in 2005 never to be heard from again? We've got a Screamer... Man Get Big Muscles In 30s. Hm...

2014 Pittsburgh Steelers helmet schedule