Skip to main content

The Pirates Tag Sale Is Open


Hi I'm Neal Huntington and welcome to the Pittsburgh Pirates continual tag sale. As GM of the Pirates I'd like to make sure that you know that we've got the left over furniture, players and junk you need, just give us a call. We're pretty much open to anything. Today we've parted with 1B Adam LaRoche for five dollars and a bag of doritos. And earlier this year we traded Nyjer Morgan and Nate McLouth away for Two Philly Cheesesteaks and a Budding Rap Superstar.

But fear not we've still got plenty of pieces to sell off if the price is right, and the price is always right.

We've got a weak hitting but slick fielding Shortstop Jack Wilson. He can be had for two dollars. Just two dollars. That's an AMAZ-A-FRICKIN-DEAL.

How about All Star Freddie Sanchez? You always can use more all stars right? Well you can have him for the low low price of my a Diet Coke a Chili Cheeseburger and a Side of Onion Rings. That's right, just pay for my lunch today and he is yours.

Do you want tempermental Ian Snell and his dominant Triple A stuff? Well today only, and its today only because its such a steal, we'll actually pay you for taking him off of our books. That's right, sign him up now and we'll pay for 75% of his contract and ask for nothing in return. That's an unbeatable bargain.

So come on down to the Pittsburgh Pirates Fire Sale Tag Sale and tell me what you want, cause chances are pretty damn good that I'll give it to you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!

Numbers On Steroids: Bret Boone

Numbers on Steroids is a look at baseball players during the 90s to see if anything screams out at you. Mr. Boone was once the best power hitting second baseman in the league. How questionable was his success? Averages Say: Why the extra plateu in his mid 30s? At Bats Per Home Run Says: Lowest at Bats Per Home Runs at 37? Hmm.... Explaining It Away Yeak, this one is tough. Umm, late bloomer? He showed potential power early in his career and he just liked playing in Seattle a lot more than everywhere else? And umm, his career was kind of like a running backs in that it just all of a sudden fell off the map? Any of these convincing you? The Verdict Guy never hits more than 24 home runs in a season and then in his age 32 season he hits 37? And in SafeCo a pitchers park to boot? And he follows that up with 24, 35, 24 homer years still at SafeCo? And then he completely falls off the map in 2005 never to be heard from again? We've got a Screamer... Man Get Big Muscles In 30s. Hm...

Numbers On Steroids: Mickey Mantle

Numbers on Steroids is a look at baseball players during the 90s to see if anything screams out at you. This week it's throwing a curve ball and looking at All Time Great Yankees. Players that we know did not take steroids to see if this gives a defense to any of the players 'convicted' by Numbers on Steroids. Time to look at my dad's favorite athlete of all time, Mickey Mantle. Averages Say: What's with the mysterious dip at 27 and then the uptick? At Bats Per Home Run Says: That's a mighty jump from 22 to 24 Explaining As If It Was the 90s If you take a look at the numbers there are two time frames which in the 1990s would be questioned. First would be the incredible leap he took from his first year in the big leagues to his first MVP season in 1956. His batting average jumped 50 points. His slugging percentage jumped 90 points and he hit 15 more homers than his previous high. This wouldn't merrit a conviction nowadays though because the young age he...