It's Time for a Thick Steak

Friday, May 30, 2008

If you look at the Home Run leaderboard you'll see some glaring absences but none wider/larger than the absence of the name Prince. And why is that name missing? It's simple, the absence of a delicious cheeseburger is bring down the big man.

The man blasted 50 homers last year eating what I can imagine only raw cattle thrown over a fire. But this offseason he was tainted, tainted of course by a powerful vagina. One strong enough to turn a 5-11 270 pound man/beast into a sappy vegetable eating fool. And who loses? Brewer fans. Brewer fans have to watch a massive man/beast turn from a hunter powerful enough to rip a deer's head off to a lazy man picking berries in a field.

Prince has a wussy 6 homers thus far this season. Jose Reyes has 7. You could fit 7 Jose Reyes' in Prince. Nate McLouth has 12 dude weighs a buck eighty. Friggin Kevin Millar has 8 home runs. You know how Kevin Millar hits 8 home runs without having any skill at all. He eats fucking beef and chicken and raw deer and washes it down with the urine of elk. That's how. Kevin Millar has no talent he hits homers on straight elk piss.

So Prince, kick that bitch to the curb. Side with steak. It's the right decision.

Posted by Simon at 4:11 PM   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

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