Skip to main content

It's Time for a Thick Steak

If you look at the Home Run leaderboard you'll see some glaring absences but none wider/larger than the absence of the name Prince. And why is that name missing? It's simple, the absence of a delicious cheeseburger is bring down the big man.

The man blasted 50 homers last year eating what I can imagine only raw cattle thrown over a fire. But this offseason he was tainted, tainted of course by a powerful vagina. One strong enough to turn a 5-11 270 pound man/beast into a sappy vegetable eating fool. And who loses? Brewer fans. Brewer fans have to watch a massive man/beast turn from a hunter powerful enough to rip a deer's head off to a lazy man picking berries in a field.

Prince has a wussy 6 homers thus far this season. Jose Reyes has 7. You could fit 7 Jose Reyes' in Prince. Nate McLouth has 12 dude weighs a buck eighty. Friggin Kevin Millar has 8 home runs. You know how Kevin Millar hits 8 home runs without having any skill at all. He eats fucking beef and chicken and raw deer and washes it down with the urine of elk. That's how. Kevin Millar has no talent he hits homers on straight elk piss.

So Prince, kick that bitch to the curb. Side with steak. It's the right decision.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!
185 comments
Continue Reading the Rest of This Fine Post

Numbers On Steroids: Mickey Mantle

Numbers on Steroids is a look at baseball players during the 90s to see if anything screams out at you. This week it's throwing a curve ball and looking at All Time Great Yankees. Players that we know did not take steroids to see if this gives a defense to any of the players 'convicted' by Numbers on Steroids. Time to look at my dad's favorite athlete of all time, Mickey Mantle. Averages Say: What's with the mysterious dip at 27 and then the uptick? At Bats Per Home Run Says: That's a mighty jump from 22 to 24 Explaining As If It Was the 90s If you take a look at the numbers there are two time frames which in the 1990s would be questioned. First would be the incredible leap he took from his first year in the big leagues to his first MVP season in 1956. His batting average jumped 50 points. His slugging percentage jumped 90 points and he hit 15 more homers than his previous high. This wouldn't merrit a conviction nowadays though because the young age he...
2 comments
Continue Reading the Rest of This Fine Post

This Is Why the New York Mets Can't Win Anymore

It's pretty simple why the Mets can't win games anymore and are morphing into the second worst team in the National League, they can't score runs. The below chart shows exactly whats happenned to their offensive output since each of the major devastating injuries. The blue line shows runs scored for each game through out the season. The pink line shows the average runs the Mets scored when they had everyone, the yellow when they were missing Delgado, the light blue when they were missing Delgado and Reyes, and finally the purple when they were missing Delgado, Reyes and Beltran. In the abscence of Reyes, Delgado and Beltran the Mets are averaging barely over 3 runs per game. In stark contrast, with everyone on the roster the Mets were scoring just over 5 runs per game. That's a wholesale difference and why their roster now equals a lot of losses and a day by day progression further out of a playoff spot.
Post a Comment
Continue Reading the Rest of This Fine Post