Why is Oliver Perez the Only Mexican Who Has to Work Today

Monday, May 05, 2008

It's Cinco De Mayo, which unfortunately lands on a miserable monday, but it's time to look at the Mexican baseball players out there and how they will be celebrating their holiday.

Mexicanos Working

Oliver Perez - I don't really know if it's a good idea for Oliver Perez to start on Cinco de Mayo. He doesn't exude work ethic to me. I see him as someone more likely to say eh screw this, if I get rocked I can get some Tequila shots earlier rather than later. Or perhaps he has tequila prior to the game and pitches better. Regardless, he certainly doesn't seem like he should be the only Mexican in Major League Baseball Working today.

Mexicanos Hoping for a Day Off

Joakim Soria - The Royals are playing tonight, but they're playing the red hot Angels with Ervin Santana on the hill against Brett Tomko. Let's just say chances are Soria has a relaxing Cinco de Mayo.

Mexicanos on Siesta

Edgar Gonzalez - He would have started tonight, but he sucked so he was replaced in the rotation by stud rookie Max Scherzer. Oh well, more time for tequila.

Yovani Gallardo - Will be doing nothing after blowing out his knee last week.

Luis Mendoza - On the DL as well, though with a 9.31 ERA I doubt the Rangers miss him.

Alfredo Amezaga - Hitting a slamming .243 for the Marlins. He shall be getting intoxicated as the Marlins do not play today.

Jorge Cantú - He's not completely sucking, but look out this week after the intense hang over is expected tomorrow.

Luis Ayala - Pitching well in the Nats pen but has the night off for a sizzling burrito dinner.

Dennys Reyes - Chillin in the warm weather of Minnesota with the night off.

Jorge Campillo - Chuckin in the pen in Atlanta with the night off, is a night trip to Mexico out of the question? I don't think so.

Oscar Villarreal - Another bullpen guy (does Mexico only produce mediocre relief pitchers?) who has the night off in Houston. That's even closer to Mexico, I think the Astros better watch Villarreal and make sure he doesn't get involved with any tranny hookers on a wild night of celebration.

Esteban Loaiza - Not starting tonight for the Dodgers, and might get his next start skipped anyway, so drink up Esteban.

Jorge de La Rosa - Got a spot start on Saturday for the Rockies, he gave up 9 runs in 4 innings. He might not get any more starts.

Posted by Simon at 2:10 PM   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!


Simon... you can go f*** yourself.... lousy junkie americans celebrate this OUR Holiday too, so off with this nonsense

Anonymous said...
5:36 AM  

More lousy junkie americans celebrate St. Patrick's Day, it's an excuse to get drunk. Lighten up.

Simon said...
8:45 AM  

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