Skip to main content

Why the Hell Not: Playoff Predictions

I'm gonna make this quick because A) I can B) I actually unfortunately do have a job C) I'm so depressed from the results of my regular season predictions and my football picks from the past weekend that well they're probably gonna be wrong anyway, so why elaborate on wrong. In fact why don't I just do it in bullet point format.

Cubs vs. Dbacks: Cubs in 4
1. There will be more Cubs fan in the BOB than Dback fans.
2. The Cubs have a better lineup with Soriano, Lee, and Ram that Ass.
3. The Cubs have better top 3 starters with Big Z, Lilly and Hill better than Webb, Dougie D, and Livan.
4. Sweet Lou > Bob Melvin
5. This is too early and not enough build up for cub fans dreams to be smashed.

Phillies vs. Rockies: Rockies in 5
1. Lineups are relatively similar in talent, slight edge Phillies.
2. Starting Pitching both stinks, Phillies have a better top starter but weaker afterwards.
3. Both Managers were on the chopping block midseason.
4. Both Teams had a hot September and a massive last week comeback.
5. The Rockies are the team of Jesus.

Red Sox vs. Angels: Red Sox in 3
1. Lackey's career ERA vs. the Red Sox is miserable, which might be an understatment.
2. Escobar was terrible the entire month of September.
3. The Angels don't have a solid #3 starter.
4. The Angels are still riddled with injuries.
5. The Red Sox have a better everything right now (lineup, bullpen, rotation).

Yankees vs. Indians: Yankees in 4
1. No one will remember Arod lighting up the Indians after the Yanks lose to the Sox in the next round. Similar to 2004.
2. CC just might win the Cy Young, the last time I saw an Cy Young front runner pitch he was giving up 6 runs in a do or die game.
3. Did you see Hoffman monday, he's a hall of famer. Now wait until Borowski is trying to close a game, that'll be a shit show.
4. Saddam might be a Yankee Fan, the Indians biggest fan is Drew Caray.
5. The Yanks and Sox matchups don't get enough their due love on ESPN and national tv. But playing in the playoffs the TV execs will have no choice to play the games so people nationwide can experience the rivalry for the first time. [sarcasm]

We'll make the next two rounds super quick. Why? Cause I probably won't get the first round right so again why elaborate on a series that probably isn't going to happen.

Rockies vs. Cubs: Rockies in 7
1. Again Team of Jesus.
2. The Fuego don't stop in the Rockies until the snow comes. Do they get snow in October?
3. Game 7 of the NLCS is a good time for the Cubbies to lose, it was fun in 2003 it will probably be fun this year.

Yanks vs. Sox: Sox in 7
1. Homefield Advantage
2. I picked the Sox to win the World Series, and unlike Steve Philips I will not change my picks constantly
3. I hope I'm a jinx

Red Sox vs. Rockies: Red Sox in 5
1. AL > NL, much greater
2. Red Sox Pitching > Rockies Pitching, much greater
3. See note 2 above from the ALCS
4. Jesus has scheduled a vacation the last week of October

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Lou Holtz is the Homer / Annoyingly Delusional

As my buddy Joe and I always joke, if Notre Dame was suiting up against an all Jesus team, aka a team made up of 55 Sons of God, Lou Holtz would probably still pick Notre Dame to win by a touchdown. So of course this weekend when I'm watching Sportscenter and they have him and fellow old man Corso making predictions, Lou picks ND to beat Michigan. Not that big of a deal, Michigan is a big question mark this year, but of course than Lou says that Notre Dame will win 11 games this year. This is the same Notre Dame that lost to a service academy last year. And just when you thought the douchy homerism was going to end ESPN asks which BCS school is going to be the biggest surprise team in the country. Any guesses to whom it was? I'll give you a clue it was another team he coached. If you guessed South Carolina you would be a winner. Next up on Lou's prediction watch, the Jets win the Superbowl, NC St. wins the ACC, Arkansas dominates the SEC West, Minnesota wins the Big...

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!

Ranking the New York Jets Historical Helmets

There's no way you can't go with the Helmet they won the Super Bowl in. You just can't. Next, I really don't understand why they don't where the helmet with the Jet as their throwback uniforms. That helmet is awesome. Then I'm going with the Helmets from the 80s because it's the classic feel and the white face mask is 10 times better than the black one. And the rankings continue until you get to... The Titans Helmet. I hate everything about those Titan uniforms. The Helmets are boring and the colors are GOD awful. Navy blue and Mustard? What the hell is that. Disgusting. If they wore those unis when I was a kid I'd probably be a Giant fan, and be much happier with my life in football.