Skip to main content

Finding a Better Token Redhead: Dead Politician Version

As a Celtic fan you come to understand the inherent necessity of a token redhead playing in the green and white uniform. Really did anyone ever look better than Bill Walton in a Celtic Jersey? But there has to be a better option than Brian Scalabrine, and thus the new feature. Todays edition focuses on Dead Political Figure Redheads.


Winston Churchill: Not exactly the most athletic or talents option out there, but you know that he can with stand some intense bombings from the opponent.

Lenin: Want person could you possibly want more to create team unity. Lenin could profess that teams are best run when all are equals and none are given perks... Maybe that wouldn't work. But atleast you would have a Malkovich look a like.

Leon Trotsky: If you can't get the #1 Russian communist than why not get his right hand man. Plus look at the sweet fro, mustache beard combo. The man knows style.


George Washington: GW not only led the US in the Revolutionary War and was our first president but at 6' 2 the dude could dominate the paint in his era.

Dwight Eisenhower: During his time they used to call him Dr. D after he showed his tremendous balling skills in the down time. You know while he wasn't leading the US to a victory in World War II.

Ulysses S. Grant: 5'8 of Whiskey guzzlin Civil War Veteran. At the very least Ulysses would provide a little extra piss and vinegar on the Celtics bench.


Thomas Jefferson: Back in the day TJ used to man up on GW all the time. 6' 2 1/2 TJ and GW had cabinet pick up games daily. Both could dunk but only TJ could dunk with authority.

Martin Van Buren: At 5 foot 6 Martin probably won't get much burn, but in fights he could provide the Jeff Van Gundy ankle biting role.

Calvin Coolidge: Was a member of my fraternity and my fraternity dominated intramural sports in my career. Basketball wasn't one of them, but whatever Calvin is a unparralleled athlete.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Lou Holtz is the Homer / Annoyingly Delusional

As my buddy Joe and I always joke, if Notre Dame was suiting up against an all Jesus team, aka a team made up of 55 Sons of God, Lou Holtz would probably still pick Notre Dame to win by a touchdown. So of course this weekend when I'm watching Sportscenter and they have him and fellow old man Corso making predictions, Lou picks ND to beat Michigan. Not that big of a deal, Michigan is a big question mark this year, but of course than Lou says that Notre Dame will win 11 games this year. This is the same Notre Dame that lost to a service academy last year. And just when you thought the douchy homerism was going to end ESPN asks which BCS school is going to be the biggest surprise team in the country. Any guesses to whom it was? I'll give you a clue it was another team he coached. If you guessed South Carolina you would be a winner. Next up on Lou's prediction watch, the Jets win the Superbowl, NC St. wins the ACC, Arkansas dominates the SEC West, Minnesota wins the Big

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!

Ranking the New York Jets Historical Helmets

There's no way you can't go with the Helmet they won the Super Bowl in. You just can't. Next, I really don't understand why they don't where the helmet with the Jet as their throwback uniforms. That helmet is awesome. Then I'm going with the Helmets from the 80s because it's the classic feel and the white face mask is 10 times better than the black one. And the rankings continue until you get to... The Titans Helmet. I hate everything about those Titan uniforms. The Helmets are boring and the colors are GOD awful. Navy blue and Mustard? What the hell is that. Disgusting. If they wore those unis when I was a kid I'd probably be a Giant fan, and be much happier with my life in football.