Santa Exists and his Name is Jim Caldwell

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Last week I asked Santa if he could find it within himself to pull out a miracle and put the Jets in the playoffs. Little did I know that Santa is in fact real and that he is able to jump into bodies and take control. How else could you possibly explain sunday?

A few things weren't really jumping out on a limb over the weekend. It was no miracle that the Jaguars lost to the Patriots. The Jaguars really aren't good. It wasn't a miracle that the Texans beat the Dolphins. Both team shared an equal record and it's been evident all season that the Dolphin secondary was the weakest link. It wasn't a miracle that the Steelers beat the Ravens. The Steelers are the defending champs, they were playing at home, and the Ravens helped out with a flag or two... ok maybe Santa helped a little on the Derrick Mason drop. It wasn't a miracle that the Broncos lost to the Eagles. The Eagles might get a bye in the NFC playoffs.

The only thing that was bordering a miracle was the Jets winning in Indianapolis. Yes they were winning at one point in the second half with Peyton in the game but it did not take very long for Peyton to erase said lead. If Peyton stays in the game I have little doubt that the Jets lose and really why would you? The Jets have collapsed in the 4th quarter all year against weak and relatively inexperienced QBs, nevermind Peyton Manning.

But Santa (or Bill Polian) jumped into Jim Caldwell's body and told him now was the time to rest up for the playoffs. Now was the time to forget about making history and chasing the undefeated dream. Now was the time for the epic Curtis Painter debut. Now was the time to screw over the Denver Broncos and hand a little Christmas gift to the Jets. This coming Sunday night, I'm expecting you to jump into Marvin Lewis' body as well and convince him to sit Carson Palmer, OchoCinco and the rest of the starters.

So thanks again Santa. All of this so that I can enjoy a first round loss. You truly are the best.

Posted by Simon at 9:33 AM   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!


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