Skip to main content

And Here Art Thou Miserably Boring Bracket Picks


Hey it's the real thing, my actual picks. I'm posting these mostly so you can mock how blatantly boring, horrible and uninspiring they are. Hey look I selected a 2 seed to make the Final Four. Oh wow, living on the edge. And look a 3 seed in the Elite 8, ahhh craziness. And look at all those upsets in the first round.

To really explain my picks I'll give bullet points cause we all love bullet points:

1) I'm biased towards the Big East, which is obvious.

2) I'm a glutton for Pitt punishment. They've burnt me countless times before so why not one more time for good measure. My theory is they are the Lonny Baxter Maryland squads. I kept on going with them and it eventually worked out for me, so why not Pitt?

3) Having watched Michigan play about 10 times, I know they aren't very good. I also know Illinois isn't very good either. Hence why they were the one 5 seed I had going down. Probably won't happen.

4) I really wanted to pick Michigan in the first round and then sacrifice them in the second but, why did they have to get Clemson in the first round?

5) I haven't watched a single Pac 10 game this year. Which probably explains me picking against basically every one.

6) I was desperately looking for a reason to knock pick UNC and the Lawson injury was an excuse to do so.

7) I hate midmajors and minors apparently.

8) I seriously contemplated Purdue over UConn but couldn't pull the trigger.

9) I seriously contemplated Clemson over Oklahoma but couldn't pull the trigger.

10) I haven't watched Memphis play at all, but I really really don't think UConn is a Final Four team anymore and really really really didn't want to go 4 #1s for the second straight year so I jumped out on a ledge and picked them.

11) And mainly, I have no balls.

If ever this bracket is a winner then we are probably in line for the most boring NCAA tournament of all time. Please Please feel free to rip all of my picks in the comments. An infant could have made better picks.

Comments

Anonymous said…
I would love to make fun of you, but I cant. My bracket is just as boring. We picked about 90% of the same games.

I am not blaming myself though. It is how the year played out. Teams looked unstoppable at times and then laid eggs the next games.

You should do a bracket where you flip a coin to determine who advances. Heads higher seed, tails lower seed. Get on it.

Popular posts from this blog

Lou Holtz is the Homer / Annoyingly Delusional

As my buddy Joe and I always joke, if Notre Dame was suiting up against an all Jesus team, aka a team made up of 55 Sons of God, Lou Holtz would probably still pick Notre Dame to win by a touchdown. So of course this weekend when I'm watching Sportscenter and they have him and fellow old man Corso making predictions, Lou picks ND to beat Michigan. Not that big of a deal, Michigan is a big question mark this year, but of course than Lou says that Notre Dame will win 11 games this year. This is the same Notre Dame that lost to a service academy last year. And just when you thought the douchy homerism was going to end ESPN asks which BCS school is going to be the biggest surprise team in the country. Any guesses to whom it was? I'll give you a clue it was another team he coached. If you guessed South Carolina you would be a winner. Next up on Lou's prediction watch, the Jets win the Superbowl, NC St. wins the ACC, Arkansas dominates the SEC West, Minnesota wins the Big

M E T S = Mercifully End The Season

Do it before David Wright gets Hurt!

Ranking the New York Jets Historical Helmets

There's no way you can't go with the Helmet they won the Super Bowl in. You just can't. Next, I really don't understand why they don't where the helmet with the Jet as their throwback uniforms. That helmet is awesome. Then I'm going with the Helmets from the 80s because it's the classic feel and the white face mask is 10 times better than the black one. And the rankings continue until you get to... The Titans Helmet. I hate everything about those Titan uniforms. The Helmets are boring and the colors are GOD awful. Navy blue and Mustard? What the hell is that. Disgusting. If they wore those unis when I was a kid I'd probably be a Giant fan, and be much happier with my life in football.