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Washington Nationals = 600 Pound Woman You Hit On at 4 In the Morning

Arod should take a lesson from Julian Tavárez in the art of brutal honesty.

"Why did I sign with the Nationals?" Tavárez said on Sunday. "When you go to a club at 4 in the morning, and you're just waiting, waiting, a 600-pounder looks like J-Lo. And to me this is Jennifer Lopez right here. It's 4 in the morning. Too much to drink. So, Nationals: Jennifer Lopez to me." (Fanhouse)

See how useful that was? He made a ton of people last and endeared himself to his organization. Ok maybe he didn't do that second part but he definitely nailed the first part.

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