World Series Extremely Quick Notes

Friday, October 31, 2008

~I stand by my statements around how it did not feel like these were the two best teams in baseball. I mean Jamie Moyer is the #3 starter? He's 93 years old and throws softer than me.

~The biggest play Wednesday night to me was not the Iwamura play but rather Upton bouncing into an easy DP. That inning had potential and it single handedly sapped all energy out of the Rays.

~I found watching the 2nd half of game 5 weird. I'm used to having my eyes stapled at 1 am while watching the conclusion of games.

~Cole Hamels is a pitching beast, but he sounds like he could use a little more testosterone in the voice.

~Joe Madden's decisions in game 5 were questionable at best. I'm unsure why he was so adamant about having a lefty face Pat Burrell. Bunting a pitcher who faces one batter the next half inning and gives up a double does not look good.

~It would have been nice if Longoria showed up. Pena would have been nice as well.

~David Price will be an all star within 2 seasons and I would trade a boatload to get him on my keeper team. The team that has him in my league also has Tiny Tim, so he's gonna be diesel for a long time.

~There's always a little luck, Zobrist ripped the shit out of the ball, just to the wrong spot.

~A neutral field world series is a stupid idea. So what if it's cold outside. I played softball in mid 30 degree weather last week, pro athletes can play when its cold out too.

~With that being said, pushing the World Series back to November is god damn stupid.

~Am I insane or are the commercial breaks between innings in playoff games significantly longer?

~Do you ever think Joe Buck during a commercial break flips out and says, "If I have to hype up this Drinkability bullshit one more time I'm gonna take my microphone and beat Tim to death with it. He can fucking read right? Make him do one damn promo."

~Philly seemed to enjoy rioting a lot.

~I would just like to say that I got almost everything right in my revised predictions. The only series I was incorrect on was the Dodgers vs. Cubs and that's via a poor choice of flip flopping. I originally had the Dodgers in 4 but then switched to the Cubs in 4 cause, I looked at the genius pre-season useless predictions and decided I should hold form to those where I had the Phillies beating the Cubs. Soy Stupido wouldo beeno 100 percento.

~Can we please get a good World Series next year? This feels just like the mid 90s Superbowl drought when ever game was an uninteresting clunker.

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NFL Week 9 Pick Suggestions


This is a week where we pick on all the miserable teams in the league... Except for the Lions of course.

5. Detroit Lions (+12 1/2) at Chicago Bears
The Lions missed three straight covers last week by a .5 a point. They get back on the losing games but covering the spread trail this week.

4. Arizona Cardinals (-2 1/2) at St. Louis Rams
Homecoming for Kurt in St. Louis means lots of tds for the offense. In addition SJax is questionable which means the Cards should cruise to a td victory.

3. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-8 1/2) at Kansas City Chiefs
The Jets played 100% miserable after several arm punts by the gun slinger and yet they still won. Jeff Garcia and the Bucs need to bounce back this week after their poor showing against Dallas and they will win by double digits.

2. Jacksonville Jaguars (-7 1/2) at Cincinnati Bengals
The Jaguars are still a good team right? I mean they have the same running backs the same line and the same Q, why aren't they dominating on the ground again? And why is Fred Taylor the most useless fantasy running back in history. They're going to win this week by a lot cause the Bengals are pitiful.

1. Philadelphia Eagles (-6 1/2) at Seattle Seahawks
The Seahawks are terrible. They won last week because the 49ers are really terrible. The Eagles need to continue to win and everything is turning up Philly this week. Eagles absolutely dominate and McNabb (newly acquired via trade for TO and others) will lead me to fantasy victories.

Survivor League Pick: SCREW Seattle
Sorry Dan-O but pick the Bears to beat the Lions.

Non-Spread Picks

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Arm Punt Formations: Practice Punting

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Episode 2 of Arm Punt Formations starring the "Gunslinger"

a comic strip!

Check out more Episodes of Arm Punt Formations

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Do College Coaches Have a Responsibility to the Community?

The question for the day to ponder is whether or not college football coaches have a responsibility for improving their community or whether or not their simple object should be to win football games at all costs.

In my personal opinion the a college coach is hired to do one thing, win football games. That's his job. Winning football games does two major things for a university. First the more a university ends up on television the more free marketing it receives. So if you look at a state University like UConn and its history of demand from out of state students it significantly ballooned after their basketball team became a national powerhouse. Now multiply the Final 4 hype by 3 because that's how much better ratings college football garners throughout the year.

Next a winning college football program significantly boosts student moral. If you have a top notch football program in the South that is contending for national titles your student body will simply be happier. In addition your alumni will be happier. They will purchase more apparel, more bumper stickers, etc. (again free advertisement). In addition alumni will be more likely to donate to both the school in general as well as the schools athletic teams.

After winning football games everything else is peripheral. Holding charity events and other things that benefit the community will never be a negative but its not necessarily in their job description. Being a mentor to students and getting them to graduate certainly is good pub for the school, but again not completely necessary. Being a good guy and well liked by people, the media, and school officials have its perks, but its never as important as winning.

Again just like the last post, the Liberty Mutual Coach of the Year is meant to be for the well rounded coach both on and off the field but is voted on by the fans. So the question is if you are a voter can you actually divide the two equally or will your eyes always be jaded to the results on the field because that is truly their job description.

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Tracking the New Faces in New Places

There are lots of new faces around the NBA, so here's a quick rundown on how they did during their debuts.

Winners

Mark D'Antoni made a nice debut with the Knicks in leading the squad to victory over the Heat. The biggest story however has to be his benching of both Curry and Marbury sending messages to both that he will not tolerate lack of team play and lack of hustle. If you're a Knicks fan last night has to get you pumped.

Jermaine O'Neal made his debut in the Raptors victory over the 76ers after forming exactly the type of twin towers the franchise was hoping for. In 34 minutes he scored 17 points and pulled down 8 boards and dished out 4 assists complimenting Chris Bosh perfectly.

Derrick Rose got his pass on during the Bulls opening night victory over the Bucks. In 32 minutes Rose dropped 9 dimes and added 11 points with most coming from the stripe.

Crazy Ron made a solid debut in the Rockets drubbing of the Grizzlies. He had 16 points and 3 steals in 40 minutes.

Yi might actually sell some jerseys for the Nets if he continues to play like he did in his debut. In the Nets 95-85 victory over the Wiz, Yi scored 17 points on 7-11 shooting with 2 triples. He also pulled down 6 boards and had 2 blocks in 31 minutes. Meanwhile Bobby Simmons, also acquired in the deal, scored 5 points on 2-8 shooting in 18 minutes to make a less flashy debut.

In the Timberwolves victory over the Kings Kevin Love got off to a very solid start to his career. In just 19 minutes of PT Love scored 12 points and pulled down 9 boards. Meanwhile, his new teammate Mike Miller did not have an aw inspiring start scoring just 11 points in 31 minutes.

James Posey will be missed in Boston and enjoyed in New Orleans. Last night during the Hornets opening victory over the Warriors Posey played 28 minutes drained 3 triples and I'm sure played stellar D on somebody.

Losers

The Thunder made their debut in Oklahoma City and unsurprisingly were defeated. Durant was the only starter to score in double figures for OKC and that was on 5-14 shooting.

As we all know Greg Oden already injured himself in his debut against the Lakeshow. Teammate Rudy Fernandez however made a solid debut with 16 points in 29 minutes including three triples.

Ovinton J'Anthony Mayo was certainly given the green light in the Grizzles loss to the Rockets but it probably wasn't a good thing. He went just 5-20 from the field including 0-7 from beyond the arc. Meanwhile in the same game Marc Gasol made his debut and went 12 and 12 in 36 minutes, not a bad day for the bearded brother.

Richard Jefferson got off to a slow start with the Bucks during their Tuesday night defeat at the hands of the Bulls. RJ shot just 5-17 from the field and pulled down just 4 boards in 38 minutes.

Elton Brand struggled in his debut against the defense of Bosh and Jermaine O'Neal. Brand only went 5-14 from the field for 14 points but he was beastly on the boards pulling down 13 boards in 39 minutes.

B Diddy certainly could have gone without the 40 point cross town drubbing in his opener against the Lakeshow. Davis played 28 minutes scored 11 and dropped 7 dimes.

TJ Ford in the Pacers loss against the Pistons struggled with the assist to turnover ratio after having only 5 assists to 4 turnovers. He also scored 10 points in 30 minutes.

Michael Beasley struggled in the first game of his career going 4-14 from the field in 27 minutes in the Heat loss against the Knicks. Additionally Beasley only pulled down 4 rebounds and went 1-5 gunning away from 3.

Mo Williams dropped 12 in their Nationally Televised loss to the Cs.

Oh and just for fun here's Marbury on the bench.

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The Big 5 College Football Games of Weekend #10

This week is a week of two games. The battle for the large cocktails and the battle for Texas Supremacy. O

5. Miami Hurricanes at Virginia Cavaliers
The Hurricanes certainly are not back to their glory days, but they still somehow have a chance with the ACC clusterfuck at the top of their division. Step 1 is defeating the resurgent Al Grohs in Grohland. The Pick: Grohs by 3

4. West Virginia Mountaineers at UConn Huskies
For all the haterade dumped on Bill Stewart for his 2 losses during the opening month of the season, he still is currently 2-0 in the Big East with a very good chance of making another trip to a BCS game. Mostly because Noel Devine is an animal not because he's a good coach. This week a trip up to Hartford to knock UConn out of the rankings which they do not deserve to be.The Pick: Mountaineers by 13

3. Florida State Seminoles at Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets
So Florida St. really jumped up those rankings this week after knocking out both of VaTech's QBs. The matchup this weekend vs. the Yellow Jackets could easily decide the ACC title game attendee. The Pick: Jackets by 3

2. Georgia Bulldogs vs. Florida Gators at the Cocktail Party
Simply put this game decides the SEC East title. This game decides who will face Bama in the SEC title game and this game arguably puts the winner in the driver seat for 1 loss teams. Will Tebow get revenge from last years td celebration? Yes. The Pick: Florida by 3

1. Texas Longhorns at Texas Tech Red Raiders
The Red Raiders always look good at the start of the year. They always beat the crap out of their out of conference opponents. They always score 9000 points against Baylor. Their QB always leads the Nation in yards and tds and passer efficiency. And they always get dominated by Texas. The Pick: Longhorns by 13.

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The Scalabrine Watch: Season Expectations

Wednesday, October 29, 2008


The 2008 season is underway and as expected Scals remained with his ass cemented to the bench. I think this will be the absolute recurring theme this year and will lead to a lot of very easy weekly updates with 3 letters prevalent everywhere: DNP.

I set the Over/Under for Scals games played at 41 and I took the under. If you look at the Celtics roster right now, when is he actually going to get in? Just blow outs or if KG/Perk have serious injuries, I'd imagine. I mean everyone knows that he doesn't exactly provide anything while on the court and chances are good that O'Bryant is in front of Scals on the Big Man Depth Chart.

In reality the more likely question is how often Scals will be wearing the uniform in comparison to the the jeans and sports jacket. Last night Scals made the 12 man roster and was rockin the warm ups (sans uni of course) at the expense of Player/Coach/Alien Sam Cassell and the rooks JR Giddens and Bill Walker. Cassell is eventually going to demand that he plays in a few games so he can average .99 shots per touch of the basketball. Giddens probably isn't ready to contribute to the squad but Walker appeared in the preseason to have some potential. Granted it was the potential to provide exciting scrub time dunks, but that's better than brick-layed white 3s. Eventually Doc is going to get Bill the Towel Urinator on the roster and into the games at the expense of Scals.

So 08-09 will be the year that Scals officials transitions into the highest paid male cheerleader in history. Congrats.

By the way, how massive are those rings?

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Buy a T-Shirt and Get Knicks Tickets

So what if they mean it the other way around, when you buy a limited edition Mark D'Antoni/Donnie Walsh T-shirt for $20.08 you get free tickets to November 5th Knicks Game vs. the Bobcats. You also get a Hot Dog a Soda and a Free Bag of chips. This could truly turn into a bargain if Larry Brown and Stephon Marbury get into a fist fight on the court. But... I still think I'm out.

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Money Does Not Equal Hawaiian Happiness

June Jones took over the Hawaiian Football program in 1999. In 9 years with the program he coached the Rainbow Warriors (he axed the Rainbow) to their best success in their history. He went 75-41, had only two losing seasons, won the WAC twice and won 4 bowl games. He was easily becoming a Hawaiian legend despite also garnering the highest public salary in the state. On January 1st his undefeated Warriors met up with Georgia, the hottest team in the nation, in the Sugar Bowl. Unfortunately for June the perfect Hawaiian season was brutally beaten into the ground with every thud of Colt Brennan's helmet to the turf.

On January 7th June Jones was introduced as the next coach of Southern Methodist University. He had left the islands for the money (and to abandon a potential sinking ship now sans Colt Brennan). This job provided one major perk, 2 million dollars annually. SMU was once a proud football program, but not during my lifetime. In fact the last time they made a bowl was 1984. Essentially money talked for June Jones over Sunshine and leis.

Fast forward to this past Saturday afternoon and I wonder what June Jones is thinking about his January decision now. On Saturday SMU fell to 1-8, but that far from tells the whole story. In their 34-7 defeat against Navy, the Midshipmen did exactly the opposite of a June Jones called game. They ran the ball, and ran the ball, and ran it some more. In fact they not once put the ball in the air (the 1st time since 1997), instead their 3rd string quarterback buried his head through the piles for 224 yards and 4 touchdowns on 42 carries.

So June, how does that Hawaiian Sunshine Sound Now?

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Degrees of Loss Separation: Wisconsin > Michigan St.

The Degrees of Loss Separation is a simple concept, I go out and find a highly rated team with some losses playing against a crappy team with lots of losses. Next I find a chain of losses which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt (not at all) that the underdog is going to pull the major upset and storm the field. The Final Outcome is calculated simply: Add up the scores of the losers, add up the scores of the winners in the degrees of loss separation and divide both by the # of degrees.

The Game: Wisconsin Badgers vs. Michigan St. Spartans

It was nearly impossible to find a game to use for the Degrees this week with many teams only losing to undefeated teams or the chains ending in undefeated teams. For instance BYU -> TCU -> Oklahoma -> Texas. Or USC facing winless Washington. So I endeded up choosing Michigan St. vs. Wisconsin because the Spartans are ranked again and the Badgers are still in the bottom half of the Big Ten. Plus, I want D'Antonio to get a beatdown after his 2-6 bath last week.

9ยบ of Loss Separation : Wisconsin > Fresno St. > Rutgers > Pittsburgh > Navy > Air Force > New Mexico > Arizona > Cal > Michigan St.

And after deciding to pick this game I had to spend like 20 minutes figuring out the Degrees because there's no close link. Any way here it is. Wisconsin was ranked at one point and knocked of Fresno St. who was also ranked when they knocked off Rutgers to open the season. Rutgers completed last weeks Degrees when they pummeled Wanny. Wanny had previously doubled up Navy. Navy snuck one out in a military showdown against Air Force by 6. Air Force however is having a solid season and knocked off New Mexico who knocked off Arizona in a border war. Mike Stoops however is also having a solid season and defeated Cal rather soundly. The same Cal Bear team opened up the season by narrowly defeating the Spartans.

Final Outcome: Wisconsin 34 Michigan St. 22

And there you have it the Badgers show a little life in what has been an incredibly disappointing season in Madison and go to the land of Sparty and put on a mini beatdown. Badgers 34 Spartans 22.

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Oden's First Night (in pictures)

Getting That All Important Left Ankle Taped

High Fives and Chest Bumps

The First of Many Opening Tip Offs

Wow That Kobe Sure Can Pass

Mano a Mano With Bynum, the Rivalry Has Just Begun

Oh Fuck God Damn Right Ankle

Crutches Blow

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Arm Punt Formations

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Episode 1 of Arm Punt Formations Starring the 'Gunslinger'

a comic strip!

Check out more Episodes of Arm Punt Formations

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NBA Over/Under Competition

Again simple over/unders just like the MLB competition. The winner gets again, mouth love from Swallowman.

1. The Celtics will win 60 games. (Over/Under)
2. Rasheed Wallace will have 12 Technicals this season. (Over/Under)
3. 4 White Guys will make the NBA All Star Teams. (Over/Under)
4. The Knicks will win 30 Games. (Over/Under)
5. Dwight Howard will average 3 Dunks a Game. (Over/Under)
6. Yao Ming will play 60 games this season. (Over/Under)
7. Greg Oden will average 14 points per game. (Over/Under)
8. Derrick Rose will average 8 assists per game. (Over/Under)
9. Jason Kidd will shoot 40% from the field. (Over/Under)
10. Big Cock Gallinari will average 9 points per game. (Over/Under)
11. Brian Scalabrine will play 41 games this season. (Over/Under)

Again my picks in the comments.

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Completely Biased and Contradictory 2008 NBA Predictions

The NBA Season has arrived so here is the biased and contradictory predictions.

NBA East

1. Boston Celtics, Atlantic Champs - The Celtics will take some time to figure out how to replace Posey on the defensive end and for clutch threes but they should be even more gelled as a unit than they were last year. Hopefully Bill Walker jumps into Posey's role a bit while not starting brawls. The Cs should have the best record in the East and approach 60 wins.

2. Detroit Pistons, Central Champs - The Pistons said they were going to shake things up in the offseason and well they didn't. Which means they will once again be 2nd best in the East.

3. Cleveland Cavs -LBJ got some toys to play with in the offseason. Should make the Cavs slightly better but not much. They should approach 50 wins because LBJ is King.

4. Orlando Magic, Southeast Champs - The Magic were a surprise last year and should hold onto the Southeast crown because very other team is terrible.

5. Philadelphia 76ers - Elton Brand makes the 76ers an intriguing watch this year.

6. Toronto Raptors - Chris Bosh is still the most unknown stud in the NBA thanks to playing in Toronto.

7. Miami Heat - A Healthy D-Wade equals the playoffs this year right? They won't need a superb record to get in and Wade should be able to reapply the superman cape.

8. Atlanta Hawks - The Hawks have no depth but still have the same 5 that lead them to the playoffs last year and gave the Cs all they could handle. J-Childress bouncing to Greece will hurt some.

9. Washington Wizards - Injuries to start the year will give them a miserable record that will be too difficult to overcome.

10. New Jersey Nets - Devin Harris will emerge as one of the best young point guards in the league but it won't be enough to get them into the playoffs.

11. Chicago Bulls - Still no low post scoring for the Bulls who missed their window to trade for a Superstar when they had the chance.

12. New York Knicks - The Knicks shall be interesting this year at least with all the big name benching D'Antoni will do, starting with fat Eddy.

13. Charlotte Bobcats - A team without a superstar is a team with a miserable record.

14. Milwaukee Bucks - Richard Jefferson and Michael Redd are not good enough to carry a team to the playoffs.

15. Indiana Pacers - Name 5 Pacers? Go... How many do you have 1? Maybe 2? Did you come up with Dunleavy?

NBA West

1. LA Lakers, Pacific Champs - With Bynum back at full strength and Pao for the entire season the Lakers should cruise into the Pac title.

2. Houston Rockets, Southwest Champs - Ron Ron fortifies the Rockets defense that much more. With Ron Ron and Shane Battier the Rockets have Crazy & Calm stud defenders. Now if only they could keep Yao and T-Mac healthy for once to have a great offense to go with the D.

3. New Orleans Hornets - Chris Paul is a beast and David West is an all star. Adding James Posey just gives them the Title experience they may need to get over the hump.

4. Utah Jazz, Northwest Champs - I <3 Deron Williams.

5. San Antonio Spurs - Manu being hobbled does not bode well for the aging Spurs who will easily make the postseason but is their run done?

6. Phoenix Suns - The Suns are going in a different offensive direction, which could end up in disaster.

7. Portland Trailblazers - The Blazers will make the playoffs this season behind their two rookies Rudy Fernandez and Greg Oden. They will emerge at the tale end of the season as the team nobody wants to open with in the playoffs.

8. Dallas Mavericks - J-Kidd is just about done but the Mavs still have enough talent to make the playoffs.

9. Denver Nuggets - Getting rid of Camby for nothing shall doom the Nuggets.

10. LA Clippers - B-Diddy is going to have a rough first year for the Clip-Show.

11. Sacramento Kings - Kevin Martin is good, but not best player on a playoff team good.

12. Minnesota Timberwolves - The T-Wolves may surprise some people this year after their additions on the perimeter, but it certainly won't be enough to make the playoffs just yet.

13. Golden St. Warriors - The Warriors are done without Monte.

14. Memphis Grizzlies - The Grizz are Gay's team and well that's not really a great thing yet.

15. Seattle Supersonics OKC Thunder - Karma says this team should have the worst record in the conference.

Eastern Conference Champs: Boston Celtics

The Lebrons gave the Cs a huge run for their money last year and chances are they will again this postseason. They just don't have enough to get it done and neither do the Pistons. The Celtics are still the class of the East and barring major injuries should once again represent the Conference in the finals.

Western Conference Champs: Houston Rockets

We're going a little balls to the walls and non-traditional with the pick this year. Somehow someway T-Mac and Yao will be healthy in the postseason. Their health plus the defense of Battie plus the sprinkling of crazy dust from Ron Ron gets them past the Lakers in the Western Conference Finals.

World Champs: Boston Celtics

I was gonna go with the Rockets to be completely out there and say I'm so smart I picked the Rockets to win the title and they did. Or say whatever I went out on a limb when they don't make the playoffs. But screw it I'm picking the Celtics to repeat. Sure they lost Posey but they replaced him with youth. They still have the Big 3 and they now have an extra year to congeal into the perfect team. The Celtics continue to dominate the NBA.

NBA Season Awards

Comeback Player of the Year: Dwayne Wade, He was out long enough to be considered comeback right?

Coach of the Year: Nate McMillan, When the Blazers are good this year the media will proclaim Nate McMillan a great coach.

Rookie of the Year: Rudy Fernandez, Greg Oden will be a beast but Rudy Fernandez will slightly outshine the big fella for the rookie of the year award.

Sixth Man of the Year: Shane Battier, When Battier gets fully healthy he will emerge as the all-around best 6th man in the league.

Defensive Player of the Year: Tayshaun Prince, Lanky Prince will get the award thanks to his Nationally Televised Defense of LBJ.

Most Improved Player of the Year: Amir Johnson, Now a starter Johnson

Most Valuable Player: Lerbon James, At some point in time the voters will stop screwing him out of the award he deserves every year.

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NBA Regular Season Recrod Predictions

Eastern Conference


W




L PCT
1 Boston

57




25 0.695122
2 Detroit

55




27 0.6707317
3 Cleveland

50




32 0.6097561
4 Orlando

44




38 0.5365854
5 Philadelphia

44




38 0.5365854
6 Toronto

41




41 0.5
7 Miami

38




44 0.4634146
8 Atlanta

36




46 0.4390244
Washington

36




46 0.4390244
New Jersey

34




48 0.4146341
Chicago

33




49 0.402439
New York

30




52 0.3658537
Charlotte

30




52 0.3658537
Milwaukee

30




52 0.3658537
Indiana

20




62 0.2439024

Western Conference



W




L PCT
1 LA Lakers

59




23 0.7195122
2 Houston

58




24 0.7073171
3 New Orleans

56




26 0.6829268
4 Utah

56




26 0.6829268
5 San Antonio

55




27 0.6707317
6 Phoenix

51




31 0.6219512
7 Portland

51




31 0.6219512
8 Dallas

50




32 0.6097561
Denver

48




34 0.5853659
LA Clippers

37




45 0.4512195
Sacramento

32




50 0.3902439
Minnesota

30




52 0.3658537
Golden State

25




57 0.304878
Memphis

23




59 0.2804878
OKC

21




61 0.2560976

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NFL Week 8 Awards

Wow You Guys Suck: Bungles & Lions, Collectively 0-15 and unfortunately not lined up to play against each other. Who wants to go winless more? Runners Up: JT O'Sullivan likes to throw the ball to the other team, Fred Taylor who is useless this season.

This Scarecrow Needs a Brain: Brett Favre, Throw the ball to the people wearing Green jerseys. They are the ones that are on your team. Runners Up: James Harrison for volunteering to long snap for the Steelers, Brett Favre again cause he was doubly stupid.

Cough Cough Cough: Tampa Bay Bucs, You've got the ball in the red zone on your final drive, you need to get it done. The Bucs just fell short and instead of leading the division they are a game behind the Panthers. Runners Up: Arizona way to get pounded in the 2nd half, the Jags apparently don't really want to make the playoffs.

The Shocker: The Chargers and Colts Standings, Coming into the season everyone thought the Chargers and Colts would remain among the elite and after 8 weeks of play both teams are on the outside looking in and absolutely reeling. Runners Up: I'm not that surprised the Dolphins beat the Bills, if the season ended today the Ravens are in the playoffs.

The Pimp: Brian Westbrook, Westbrook just might be the league's most valuable player. Every time the Eagles have him they put up dominant offensive stats and every week they don't they look lost in both the run and pass game. This week he was back for 167 and 2 tds on the ground plus 42 receiving yards. Runners Up: Drew Brees enjoyed his London trip, Ted Ginn Jr. with 175 yards huh?

You Got Jakked Up: Vernon Davis, Verbally Jakked up that is.

My Fantasy MVP: Santana Moss, the most inconsistent fantasy player of all time has one of his super weeks when I need it.

New York Jets MVP: Leon Washington, Leon is the only player on the Jets offense with breakaway speed and he showed it on several occasions this weekend.

My Picks

My Picks: 8-6
Preseason Picks: 8-6
Picks Vs. Spread: 4-10
Pick Suggestions: 2-3

Very very very very bad week. Two suggestions lost by .5 a point which is gay.

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Remember When...

I lost my suicide pool in week 2 because the F'n Seahawks lost at home to the 49ers. Well it pisses me off that A) They beat the shit out of them this weekend. and B) Since that point in time I have not gotten a single pick wrong on the Eliminator Challenge on ESPN. Go Screw Seattle.

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Return of the White Warriors

Monday, October 27, 2008

I created another Fantasy Hoops League that will draft this sunday in which I will once again draft the 2008 version of the White Warriors. If you care to join then here are the settings. Yahoo League ID#: 135671, Password: password. Or just follow this link.

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The World Series is Zzzzz...

Can we get some damn excitement for once in a World Series? Please just one F'n time. The last good World Series was 2002 when the Angels pulled off a 7th game win against Barroid. Since then we've been subjected to the Anti-Climactic World Series of 2003 where the drama was all in the ALCS and NLCS, 3 sweeps and an 82 win Cardinal team taking home the crown. It's been boring. And this World Series thus far has been no different.

Game 1 was brutally ugly with nobody getting any clutch hits. Game 2 started with an error by the Phils and some bad calls by the umps and more Phillies pathetic hitting. Game 3 started after 10 on a Saturday with little to no one watching. And Game 4 turned into a beatdown where even Joe Blanton hit home runs. The only exciting drama came in Game 3 at quarter to 2 in the morning. That's the perfect time for great baseball.

All in all I think the problem with the World Series is that at no point in time does it really feel like these are the two best teams in baseball. Perhaps it is just me, but watching a team go 1 for their first 28 with runners in scoring position does not scream great baseball. Watching a teams 3 and 4 hitters go 0 for in the first 4 games does not scream great baseball. Watching the winning run of a game come on a hit by pitch, a wild pitch, an error and a swinging bunt does not scream great baseball. Watching both defensive teams (one supposedly superb) make at least one error in each game a piece does not scream great baseball. It just feels more like an inter-league series in June than the World Series. Perhaps this will change if the Rays can finally get to Hamels tonight, but chances are this World Series will fall right in line with the past 5 in the easily forgettable category.

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NCAA Week 9 Power Rankings

Remember this is all about Quality Wins and Bad Losses so if you lose to a top ranked team its not going to kill you, if you lose to Arkansas St. in the opener it will haunt you the entire season.

And the undefeateds now sit at 4 with PSU, Bama, TT and UT all getting it done. This time next week there shall be 1 less.

1. Texas - No bones about it, Texas is the #1 team in the country right now. One thing you did learn is that Oklahoma St. is for real. They had the ball with a chance to win in the 4th and through dumb play calling couldn't get it done. Quality Wins: Oklahoma(n), Mizzou, Oklahoma St.

2. Alabama - Nick Saban busted out the beat down stick on Fulmer's Belly. Quality Wins: @Georgia

3. Penn St. - The Old man won the big one. Now its avoiding a horrible loss and hoping for a Saban meltdown. Quality Wins: Illinois, Oregon St., @Ohio St.

4. Georgia - So all eyes on the Cocktail party this weekend don't you think? Quality Wins: South Carolina, Vandy, @LSU

5. Oklahoma - Sam Bradford is playing like the best quarterback in the Nation by a longshot. It certainly wasn't his fault the Sooners lost to the Longhorns and after this weekends 470 yard performance he might just be atop the Heisman board. Quality Wins: TCU, Kansas

6. Oklahoma St. - Oklahoma St. looked pretty damn good on Saturday. They could potentially be the 2nd best team in the Big 12. Quality Wins: @Mizzou

7. USC - Not that strong a performance against Arizona but still I think USC could beat any team in the country. Quality Wins: Ohio State, Oregon Bad Loss: Oregon St.

8. Florida - Tim Tebow might be back to scoring tds like 2007. Quality Wins: LSU Bad Loss: Ole Miss

9. Texas Tech - Ok ok I submit you win this week Mike Leach. You ate up the fat man so I'll let you in. But if you get your arse kicked this weekend you will be dropped. Quality Wins: Kansas

10. TCU - One massive win against the mormons keeps TCU in the mix. Quality Wins: BYU

11. Utah - Is Air Force good? They only have 2 losses but I have never seen them play so I have no idea. Quality Wins: @Air Force, Oregon St.

Dropped Out: Boise St. cause I had to include TT

Noticeable Absences: Nobody really

(n) = neutral field

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Week 9 College Football Picture Caption

DOOOOHHH!!!!
Wanny Proving 1 Game At A Time That He Can Lose to Anybody

TY DEPRESSIONHAM
Someone is in need of a Mercy Kill

Tip Drills
Usually It's Not a Good Idea to Throw into Triple Coverage, But Usually isn't Sam Bradford

The Face of Fear
You Would Think With That Face He has a Role Locked Up in Saw VI

Giving the Stink Palm
No Doubt Saban Just Whiped His Ass and Didn't Wash His Hands

The Hurdler
Nothing is More Comfortable than the Gliding of the Cheeks over a LB's Helmet

Pryor Failure
Look On the Bright Side, You Aren't in Ann Arbor

Patent Leather Lebron
Perhaps He Should Have Taken Over at QB

2-6 Showers
Where Beating the Worst Wolverine Team Ever is Somehow Worthy of This

Superman Dives
Saving All Groh's Job 1 Leap at a Time

Smell My Fingers
They Smell Like Bleeding Anus

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GameDay Sign Creation: Penn St. vs. Ohio St.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Did Joe Pa forget to go to the bathroom or does he just wear Depend Diapers?

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Zamboni Does Complete the Family

At first I said "A Kid named Zamboni? Well that's just F'n stupid." But Looking below, he really does complete the family.

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NFL Week 8 Pick Suggestions


Where picking the Lions with the points continues to happen for no apparent reason.

5. Detroit Lions (+7 1/2) vs. Washington Redskins
Should the Redskins absolutely destroy the Lions? Yes. Will they? Probably. But the Lions are on a 2 straight cover streak for me behind Dan Orlovsky and I'm sticking with them.

4. New Orleans Saints (+3 1/2) vs. San Diego Chargers in London
I think this is a toss up game with both teams still not being healthy at all. I'm taking the Saints simply thanks to the 3 1/2 points.

3. Arizona Cardinals (+4 1/2) at Carolina Panthers
I know the Panthers absolutely beat the crap out of New Orleans last weekend but I think fresh off the bye week the Cardinals offense is going to be firing on all cylinders. Do I think the Cardinals will win? Well yes I do. But I certainly won't throw away those 4 1/2 points I get either.

2. Oakland Raiders (+6 1/2) at Baltimore Ravens
Flacco has not played well in recent weeks, the Ravens offense still isn't explosive and 6 1/2 points is a lot to give in those circumstances. I think the Raiders lose but keep it close.

1. New England Patriots (-7 1/2) vs. St. Louis Rams
The Pats showed a little 2007 in their dominant victory monday night over the Broncos. I don't think they will look quite that good this weekend, but they should be good for more than a touchdown victory.

Survivor League Pick: SCREW Seattle
Eagles need the win at home and Westbrook should be a go. Plus Matty Ice is due for a bad game.

Non-Spread Picks

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Silhouette Trivia: Left Handed Hitter Edition

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Below there are ten Silhouette's of All-Star Left Handed Hitters. How well can you identify each of these famous stances / follow-throughs? If you get stumped you can opt for help by either going here for 10 clues or here for the list of the 10 players so you can match them up to each Silhouette. When you're done or have given up, here are the answers.

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