Monday, January 14, 2008
Sunday 9:30 AM
Tom: Hey Peyton, did you see me last night? Wasn't I god damn awesome?
Peyton: Yes Tom you were pretty good, but my DirectTV was coming in fuzzy and I was trying to gameplan for the Chargers so I didn't see much.
Tom: The Chargers? Seriously, they blow, we killed them. You guys should run the train on them. If you don't have at least 3 touchdowns against them you suck.
Peyton: We already lost to them and we need to play great to beat them.
Tom: Ha oh yeah I completely forgot about that. 6 Interceptions, man I almost coughed up a lung I was laughing so hard. The best was when short leg Vinny T missed a chip shot field goal. Man that was hilarious, probably funnier than Superbad.
Peyton: Ya that's great, Tom. I'm gonna leave now.
Tom: Alright, just make sure you win cause I want to kick your ass tomorrow.
Sunday 4:20 PM after the Clark Incompletion
Peyton: [sad face] Tom's gonna call me and be a complete douchebag...
Sunday 4:23 PM
Tom: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, You guys seriously lost to Billy Volek? Damn you guys suck.
Peyton: That's great Tom.
Tom: Billy god damn Volek. Ha. Good thing you got your pussy #1 wideout back so he could fumble. That was classic. So what do you think we're going to beat San Diego by? You think I can throw 7 touchdowns and our defense can shut them out?
Peyton: Can I go, dick?
Tom: Ha, what Peyton, I can't make fun of you cause you are pathetic? What kind of friendship is this.
Peyton: I'm hanging up.
Tom: Ok Peyton, just want to say thanks for smoothing our undefeated ride.
Sunday 7:43 PM
Peyton: What now?
Tom: Your loser brother is even better than you.
Peyton: Ugh, sure Eli is great.
Tom: Hahahaha, you're not even the best Manning anymore. Elisha doesn't lose to Billy Volek.
Peyton: Good for Eli.
Tom: Ha, ya right you're pissed off, you know your brother is a loser, and now you're a bigger one.
Tom: God what's up his ass...
Monday 6:43 AM
Tom: [Peyton's Phone Goes to Voicemail] Ha you won't even answer the phone anymore. Anyway, I called Billy Volek's trailer park and he's gonna send you and autographed poster for you to hang on the wall signed, "I kicked your ass loser. Billy Volek". Just thought that you would cherish that forever. Well I'm gonna go to practice, have fun playing golf this week.