January's Waste of Oxygen Award

Thursday, January 31, 2008

The month of January might have gotten off to a slow start when it comes to complete douchebags but it certainly took an upswing during the closing weeks.

Week 1: Chris Burke - Wanna know how to force your step mother into a divorce. First you need your step father to be the coach of a big time college football team. Second you need to sucker him into having you on the sidelines working some job he made up for you. And finally you need to run out onto the field and get a crucial penalty in a Bowl Game. What a moron.

Week 2: The Ohio State University - Two straight years you tease us with your explosive starts only to be completely out of the game by the 4th quarter. Why must you be completely outclassed by the SEC, why must you win all of your cupcake games and not lose to the likes of Stanford like USC. Must you punish college football fans by winning all of the winnable games but getting pummeled by the superior squads in the Title game?

Week 3: Greg Paulus - The Brazilian Soccer player of College Basketball. King of the flop with horrible acting included. Pretending to get punched in the face when a guy taps your shoulder is incredibly lame. Needless to say I don't think anyone would be incredibly disappointed if Florida St. did in fact punch Greg Paulus in the face. It's one thing to be a scrappy annoying player like Wojo was in his day, it's another thing when you are a scrappy annoying player who attempts to cheat.

Week 4: The Ultimate Warrior - I'm really not surprised that the Ultimate Warrior is a scumbag, but to these depths? Seriously? Dude he wasn't even gay he just played a gay man, what the hell does that have to do with parenting? Plus you can be opposed to the idea of homosexuality that's fine it's your opinion, but does it seriously make that big of a difference in raising a child. And he wasn't even gay anyway. Ugh so stupid.

Get Your Vote On

December's Winner:
Stephen A Smith

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Breakin it Down: New England Patriots

Breakin it Down is usually 5 key stories plus a pick for each postseason game. But for the Super Bowl we'll do 5 keys for the Giants and Pats and a post for what I think will occur.

Twice Rotten?

Can the Golden Boy have two bad playoff games in a row? Obviously him having a poor game like AFC Title game will give the Giants a much better opportunity to win the football game. But with two weeks of rest and on the biggest stage, hoping that Tom Brady has a poor game probably isn't the best game plan.

Pound the Rock

Given that the Patriots have arguably the best quarterback in the history of Pro Football it wouldn't be dumb if they decided to just throw the ball on every down. However, if Laurence Maroney can rush for over 100 yards like he has done in each of the playoff games than the Patriots will be absolutely unstoppable. Any 3rd and shorts Tom Brady is going to pick up.

Bring Out the Manning Face Early

Is Eli a changed quarterback with tremendous confidence? I feel as if everybody is over hyping Eli now after being too critical much of the season. If the Patriots can hit Eli a few times early or better yet force a turnover or two in the first quarter it's very foreseeable that Manning shits the bed for the rest of the game.

Frustrate Plaxico

If there is one Me player left on the current Giants roster it's Plaxico Burress. He's the only remaining player who if he doesn't get the ball will come back into the huddle and start bitching while Eli is talking. If the Pats can rough up Plaxico and double him early in the game and limit his touches early there is a good chance that Plaxico will get frustrated and begin yapping. However, if Plaxico makes a few early catches his confidence will start to build both through his play and all the yapping he will do towards the Pats DBs. Limiting Plaxico early will pay big time dividends for the Patriots.

Just Play Your Game

You can talk all the keys for Pats victory you want. But the #1 thing the Pats need to do is just play their game. They are about to become the best team in the history of the planet because they are superbly coached and have superb talent and a superior cohesiveness. In order for the Patriots to lose this weekend they are going to have to do something wrong something out of the normal. Whether that be Brady playing poorly, a few costly turnovers, the offensive line playing poorly for the first time, or the defense completely collapsing. The Patriots need to do something out of character to lose the game.

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Jesus Saves Jeff Gordon?

Personally I'm not much of a vanity license plate or bumper sticker guy. I feel as if in most scenarios it opens you up to ridicule. You pay money for people to make fun of you, genius.

For instance today was so classic I needed to pull out my phone and take a picture. I am driving into work and pull behind a white station wagon. I had seen this station wagon before, really how can you miss a license plate that says "SAVES" with a a big Jesus bumper sticker on the bumper. But today I noticed something extra. A beautiful #24 Jeff Gordon Sticker in the window. Thus the three words "JESUS SAVES JEFF GORDON" or "JEFF GORDON SAVES JESUS" if you prefer immortalizing a NASCAR driver as the hero of Christianity.


This car should be shown to anyone that ever buys and applies a bumper sticker on their car.

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Breakin it Down: New York Giants

Breakin it Down is usually 5 key stories plus a pick for each postseason game. But for the Super Bowl we'll do 5 keys for the Giants and Pats and a post for what I think will occur.

Be Special

Domenik Hixon was special during their first matchup. He obviously had the touchdown return which pulled the momentum back to New York but the rest of his returns were dynamic as well. Additionally any time the Giants are forced to punt it is key that the king of the Coffin Corner nails it down in the red zone. The Giants absolutely need their special teams to outperform the Patriots to win this game.

Thunder & Lightning

Ron Dayne and loudmouth Tiki Barber never fulfilled the Thunder and Lightning trademark. Mostly because Ron Dayne hit up the donut shop daily and had love handles like a defensive tackle. Regardless, the Giants now have put together two second day draft picks to assemble what they couldn't in the past. They have the bruising Juggernaut built like a defensive end in Jacobs. And then they have the smallish might mouse running back in Bradshaw. In the first matchup Jacobs played well but Bradshaw sat the game out. This weekend the combo could potentially put them over the top.

Stop Stupid Kevin Faulk and Wes Welker

Everyone seems to focus on Moss when playing the Patriots. This is understandable as he can score a touchdown on every single play. But the two players that somehow always get lost in the shuffle are the two players that Brady consistently looks for when he needs a clutch 3rd down conversion. If you set up a zone D than Welker is going to find that hole. If you man up on and pay close attention on Welker than Faulk will deceptively make it look as if he is staying in protection only to slip out of the backfield for a 1st down reception. The Giants need to get the Patriots off the field on third down like they did to the Packers in order to win the game.

Pressure Mr. God with 4

The Giants defensive line has been given a lot of praise for only coming up with 4 sacks in the last 4 games. But sacks are not everything as was seen during the 4th quarter of the Cowboys game. Despite not sacking Romo often the Giants hit him on every play and forced him to throw before he wanted to or without the necessary space to step into the throw. This is what the Giants front 4 needs to do. The Giants can't blitz consistently or Wes Welker will wind up with 13 catches and 13 first downs. The Giants front 4 are by far the most important piece of the team come Sunday evening.

Hit a Big Play

Plaxico Burress has a big time advantage over anyone who lines up against him this weekend. He's fast, he's athletic and he's much much bigger than the Patriots cornerbacks. In the first game Burress had two tds plus a huge 52 yard catch at the start of the game as well as the phantom no interference call. I'd imagine the Patriots focus much of their attention on Burress but on those plays when he is singled up the Giants need to take advantage.

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The Knicks are Giving Them Away

Wednesday, January 30, 2008


So my buddy at work is a Ranger/Knick fan and occasionally gets deals for both sent to his inbox. Today he got one such deal from the Knickerbockers. 2 Tickets & Free food for $22 bucks. That's 11 bucks a piece to go to an NBA game and get their crappy food for in essence going to Panera Bread for dinner and getting a cookie afterwards. The Knicks are desperate.

In edition the Knicks apparently aren't to adept at looking at the NBA standings. Is 4 tickets and food plus 'yearbooks' and 'cheer styx' for 4 different games at 99 bucks. The kicker is that one of these games is against the New Orleans Hornets. The same Hornets who are currently leading the Western Conference. Yep, that's a shitty team that no one will want to see.

Update: For those that like killing me for my typical typos, atleast I don't get paid for the stuff I do, unlike the person that falsely identified Fred Jones as Nate Robertson when captioning the picture.

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This Just in The Heat Really Suck


The Heat losing by 30 to the Celtics on the surface makes sense. The Celtics have the best record the Heat have the 2nd worst. But when you find out Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett didn't play and Paul Pierce only had 7 points, seriously?

~Leon Powe has scored 94 total points this season. 94 and that is after the 25 he dropped last night.

~Scalabrine started again and had a +/- which isn't good for the Scalabrine watch.

~Chris Quinn was the only Heat player to have a positive +/- and he didn't score at all.

~Tony Allen had a ridiculous +32 almost matching him on the poor side was D Wade with -25.

~When Mark Blount is your player of the game you know your team blows.

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The Midweek Nut Cracker


http://view.break.com/442299 - Watch more free videos

I wonder if this kid ever realized that he could have in fact kicked the pole with his foot and avoid the nut crunch. Oh well, God probably thought he didn't deserve children anyway.

New rule here, if it can expand the children in pain category than it can have its own post and does not need to wait for the Blowout on Friday.

Courtesy of the Duece

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Which Conference Dominates the Super Bowl?

As a follow up to Conference Championship Game Post, I'm going to do a bit of analysis on the construction of the Super Bowl Rosters.

Top Conferences Represented in the Super Bowl

1. SEC (23) - New York Giants (8) New England Patriots (13)

2. ACC (17) - New York Giants (13) New England Patriots (4)

Tie-3. Big Ten (14) - New York Giants (6) New England Patriots (8)

Tie-3. Division 1-AA (14) - New York Giants (10) New England Patriots (4)

5. Pac 10 (13) - New York Giants (8) New England Patriots (5)

6. Conference USA (12) - New York Giants (5) New England Patriots (7)

7. Big 12 (11) - New York Giants (2) New England Patriots (9)

Tie-8. Big East (5) - New York Giants (4) New England Patriots (1)

Tie-8. Independents (5) - New York Giants (2) New England Patriots (3)

10. Sun Belt (4) - New York Giants (3) New England Patriots (1)

Tie-11. WAC (3) - New York Giants (0) New England Patriots (3)

Tie-11. MAC (3) - New York Giants (2) New England Patriots (1)

Tie-11. D2 or Lower (3) - New York Giants (2) New England Patriots (1)

Dead Last: Mountain West with Zero Players Represented.

Masters of the Rankings

I could have done everyone, but than this would have been the only post for the day so we are limiting it to the top 25 players in the list at ESPN.

Big Ten - Tom Brady (1), Plaxico Burress (6), Mike Vrabel (9), Matt Light (14), Laurence Maroney (18), David Diehl (23)

SEC - Richard Seymour (4), Eli Manning (15), Gbril Wilson (21)

ACC - Chris Snee (10), Vince Wilfork (11), Dan Koppen (17)

D1-AA - Michael Strahan (5), Brandon Jacobs (19), Rodney Harrison (24)

Conference USA - Randy Moss (2), Asante Samuel (8)

Big 12 - Ty Warren (12), Wes Welker (13)

Pac 10 - Antonio Pierce (20), Tedy Bruschi (22)

Sun Belt - Osi Umenyiora (3)

WAC - Logan Mankins (7)

Independent - Justin Tuck (16)

Big East - Shaun O'Hara (25)

Top Teams Represented in the Super Bowl

1. Miami (6) - Vince Wilfork, Brandon Meriweather, Sinorice Moss, Jeremy Shockey, William Joseph, Jeff Feagles

Tie-2. USC (5) - Matt Cassel, Oscar Lua, Junior Seau, Steve Smith, Manuel Wright

Tie-2. LSU (5) - Kevin Faulk, Jarvis Green, Eric Alexander, Randall Gay, Corey Webster

Tie-4. Tennessee (4) - Donte' Stallworth, Kelley Washington, Rashad Moore, Gibril Wilson

Tie-4. Marshall (4) - Troy Brown, Randy Moss, Chris Hanson, Ahmad Bradshaw

9 Way Tie for 6th at 3 - Arizona, BC, Fresno St., Georgia, Georgia Tech, Memphis, Michigan, Notre Dame, Penn St.

Conclusion

The SEC dominated in total number of players in the Super Bowl, but the Big Ten clearly has the best players in the Super Bowl vastly outdistancing themselves from the competition based off that ESPN list. Additionally when you Miami on the top of the individual team list it just makes you wonder that much more how that program ever went in the tubes the past few seasons.

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Bill Smith's Deal or No Deal Journey

Tuesday, January 29, 2008


Howie Mandel: Hello Bill, welcome to Deal or No Deal.

Bill Smith (Twins GM): Hello Howie, I'm here to win myself some big time prospects.

Howie Mandel: Well Bill I just want to inform you that because of the 8 billion dollar contract we are going to have to elminate the million dollar case.

Bill Smith: Well that's some big time bullshit.

Howie Mandel: I'm sorry but those are the cases you were dealt. Ha cases get it? I guess not. Additionally we are not letting you choose you're initial case, you will get the case which has a year of Santana and two first round Sandwich picks.

Bill Smith: Such nonsense.

Howie Mandel: Eh shutup, you work for the Twins. Now, onto the Start please pick 5 cases.

Bill Smith: I choose 24, 23, 22 and 21 and 20.

Howie Mandel: How original of you. Oooh you knocked off a bunch of cases in the middle. Your current offer is Jacoby Ellsbury, Jed Lowrie and Justin Masterson from the Red Sox.

Bill Smith: That's it? Come on where is Jon Lester or Clay Bucholz?

Howie Mandel: Not there. Do you want to pull down more cases or are you going to accept the deal?

Bill Smith: No chance, let's go again. NO DEAL. I choose cases 19, 18, and 17..

Howie Mandel: You are friggin boring. Well the banker says you are about the same level. This time your deal is with the Yankees and includes Phil Hughes, Melky Cabrera and one of their minor league prospects. What will you decide?

Bill Smith: Do I look like a moron? NO DEAL. Give me cases 16, 15, and 14.

Howie Mandel: The deal has gone slightly up. The Mets are offering you every single farmhand they have.

Bill Smith: I want Reyes, screw them. NO DEAL. Give me cases 13, 12 and 11.

Howie Mandel: The Yankees deal is back on the table but you have to decide by tomorrow.

Bill Smith: F that I want Kennedy and Hughes. They will come back to me. NO DEAL. I'll take cases 9, 8 and 7.

Howie Mandel: Ouch it looks like the Red Sox have removed Ellsbury from the trade and only will give you Coco Crisp along some other prospects.

Bill Smith: Haha, you're funny Howie. I don't want no Coco, I'm a coffee guy. NO DEAL. Give me cases 6, 5, and 4.

Howie Mandel: Sorry Bill but the banker doesn't even want to give you a deal right now cause you're being such a douche. So pick another case.

Bill Smith: Uh Ok. No Deal I guess. I'll take case #3.

Howie Mandel: Ok Bill you have two cases remaining along with the one in your possession. The Yankees are offering you a deal with Ian Kennedy as its centerpiece. What will you do?

Bill Smith: No I said I want Reyes or Hughes. NO DEAL. Give me case 2 that'll bring the deal back up to where it should be.

Howie Mandel: Alright Bill you're down to the case you have in your hands. 2 sandwich picks and a year of Santana or your final offer from the banker.... A deal with the Mets including Phil Humber and Carlos Gomez?

Bill Smith: Umm, Umm, Umm....

Howie Mandel: Make a god damn decision so I can bag one of these models already.

Bill Smith: I'll take the Mets deal.

Howie Mandel: Fuckin Dumb Ass. Well that's it for Deal or No Deal. Next Week we'll have the Baltimore Orioles in and their dealings of Eric Bedard.

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Barbaro Be Dead But Not Yet Buried


One year ago today Barbaro died and apparently it took one full year for them to decide to bury him. Apparently my birthday just sparks Barbaro news.

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Building the 2008 Jets: The Importance of Matt Ryan

It didn't take me very long to lose hope during the 2007 season but for 2008 I'm going to be doing a lot dedicated prep work. Holding the 6th pick in the draft and 26 million dollars in cap room the New York Jets must be aggressive in the free agent market to address some of the current holes on their roster.

When evaluating who the Jets will be able to draft with their #6 pick there is one overwhelmingly important event that could dictate whom the Jets can draft. That event is the potential drafting of Matt Ryan.

In almost every nfl scouting or draft preview page you go to there is a consensus top 5. DT Glenn Dorsey, DE Chris Long, OT Jake Long, RB Darren McFadden and DT Sedrick Ellis. After this there is no consensus. So with the Jets picking 6th their hope is reliant on a franchise over valuing a QB. The Atlanta Falcons as well as the Miami Dolphins are both n desperate need for such a franchise quarterback, and Matt Ryan is currently the #1 option to fulfill this requirement. But is he really worth a top five pick? Will either of these teams take him instead of players that are unilaterally ranked ahead of him? I know I wouldn't but will they? Who knows?

So what happens to the Jets if the Falcons either decide to go elsewhere with their pick or trade down to someone looking for one of the consensus top 5? The Jets will have to do a bit of dipping on that 'experts' do not have a consensus opinion on. There's DE Vernon Gholston who many love who could potentially turn into a solid outside 3-4 linebacker. Calais Campbell a big defensive end from Miami. Chris Williams an offensive tackle for Vandy. Or any of the other players ranked all over the top to middle of the 1st round by the 'experts'.

Simply put, one of the biggest keys to how the Jets utilize their first round pick is completely reliant on someone above them falling for the bait and convincing themselves that Matt Ryan is their QB of the future.

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January 29th in History

January 29th in History According to Wikipedia

  • 1595 - William Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet is probably first performed.


  • 1845 - "The Raven" by Edgar Allan Poe is published in the New York Evening Mirror.


  • 1863 - Bear River Massacre.


  • 1886 - Karl Benz patents the first successful gasoline-driven automobile.


  • 1900 - The American League is organized in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania with 8 founding teams.


  • 1916 - World War I: Paris is first bombed by German zeppelins.


  • 1936 - The first inductees into the Baseball Hall of Fame are announced.


  • 1945- Tom Selleck, American actor born


  • 1954 - Oprah Winfrey, American producer, actress, talk show host, and publisher born


  • 1963 - First inductees into the Pro Football Hall of Fame are announced.


  • 1964 - Andre Reed, American football player born


  • 1965 - Dominik Hašek, Czech ice hockey player born


  • 1970 - Heather Graham, American actress born


  • 1973 - Jason Schmidt, American baseball player born


  • 1983 - I was Fucking Born.


  • 1995 - Super Bowl XXIX: The San Francisco 49ers defeat the San Diego Chargers 49-26 and become the first NFL team to win five Super Bowl titles.


  • 2007 - Barbaro, American thoroughbred racehorse dead (b. 2003)


  • 2007 - Somebody tells me that they hope no one cares when I die.


  • None of those links are going to work... Sorry about that.

    Correction they should work now...

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    Finding a Better Token Redhead: The Animated Version

    As a Celtic fan you come to understand the inherent necessity of a token redhead playing in the green and white uniform. Really did anyone ever look better than Bill Walton in a Celtic Jersey? But there has to be a better option than Brian Scalabrine, and thus the new feature. Todays edition focuses on Animated Redheads.


    Daphne Blake: You need someone on the bench to solve a mystery, someone on the bench with a talking dog? Daphne Blake is your gal than. Have you solved any mysteries this year Scals?

    Ariel: Playing in or near the ocean and need to talk to the fishes? Need a girl who can morph into human form if needed? Than Ariel is your gal. Can Scals turn into a Merman if he wants? I don't think so.

    Jessica Rabbit: Jessica Rabbit could be a key strategic asset for the Celtics. Throw her into the game and have her set screens all game long and eventually someone is either going to truck her over or start doing a little grabbing and squeezing in inappropriate places. I'm assuming that copping a feel would be a technical foul. How many technical fouls have you drawn this year Scals?


    Phoenix: Need a player who can both start a fire and move things with her mind. As well as being an attractive tease to bring opponents in only to set them on flames? Well the Phoenix can knock out the best player on the other team with severe burns in every game. When was the last time you did the burning instead of the opposite Scals?

    Beaker: Need a moron who can't do anything and will probably make everything he does into a disaster? Well than you can choose from Scals or Beaker.

    Groundskeeper Willie: Need a Semi nuts Scottish immigrant willing to wear a Kilt, clean your toilets, run around with a shovel, and be generally pissed off 24/7? Than Groundskeeper Willie is your man. Maybe the Celtics should just have Scalabrine clean their toilets. Hmm...

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    You Don't Voluntarily Choose the Middle

    Monday, January 28, 2008


    Please read up on your etiquette and stop crowding my god damn space. And feel free to accomplish this.

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    Words Not In Eddy Curry's Vocabulary: Box Out

    Last night the Knicks, what a surprise, and in doing so they allowed a season high 26 rebounds to Andris Biedrins. Andris is listed with the same height as Eddy Curry but only 40 lbs lighter. Meaning that it really shouldn't be difficult for Curry to get in front of Biedrins and push him around a bit. Yet Curry finished with a 4 rebounds. FOUR. You know what other Knick had 4 rebounds? 5 foot 8 Nate Robinson. Eddy Curry is the worst rebounder in the history of the NBA.

    But I guess dunking on people is cool.


    1 Poster + 4 Rebounds - 26 Rebounds = 1 Loss

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    The FA Cup is Sweet

    There are many things about European Soccer Leagues that I wish were brought to the United State. One being the idea of relegation and the other being the sweetness of the FA cup. For those that are completely in the dark, the FA Cup is a massive tournament in England which consists of all organized soccer teams in the country. From those that just play on the weekends for fun in an FA league to the greatest teams in the country.

    Well this weekend after winning some improbable games, one of those 'just for fun' teams went into Anfield, home of powerhouse premiership club Liverpool, and not only competed but actually held the lead for much of the game. In the end they lost 5-2 but for over 30 minutes the small town boys were beating one of the best teams in the country.



    Hell even the professionals couldn't control their emotion when the massive underdogs scored their first goal.



    Just imagine how sweet it would be to be beating the Boston Red Sox in Fenway after 5 innings or leading the LA Lakers after 3 quarters. The idea of the FA Cup is something that I absolutely wish was brought to the US so that at some point in time we could get stories like this.

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    The Ohioan Wolverines

    Apparently Wolverine and Ohio St. fans are very eager to have another person do their research for them as I've received another request, this time to see how many Wolverines are from Ohio. I'm obviously not going to do a complete history of the Wolverines and how many of them are from Ohio. This list consists of the 1st rounders from last week, the current NFL players, the 2007 Wolverine Roster, and the current recruiting class.

    2007 Wolverine Roster (7 of 113)

    First things first, college rosters are way larger than you think. ESPN.com lists 113 players on Michigan's roster page of which only 7 are from the state of Ohio. This to me is a bit surprising, but they still did bring in two major contributors from Ohio in Shawn Crable and Mario Manningham. Both of whom are will be headed to the pros in a few months to give the NFL a Michigan Ohioan boost.

    Shawn Crable LB Sr. Massillon, OH
    Brandon Harrison CB Jr. Dayton, OH
    Mike Milano RB Jr. Rocky RIver, OH
    Bryan Wright K So. Youngstown, OH
    Justin Boren OL So. Pickerington, OH
    Mike Massey TE Jr. Brecksville, OH
    Mario Manningham WR Jr. Warren, OH

    2008 Wolverine Recruits (4 of 18)

    Rivals.com lists the Wolverines as having 18 current commits. Out of these 18, four are from the state of Ohio with all four being four star recruits.

    Taylor Hill LB Youngstown, OH
    Kevin Koger TE Toledo , OH
    Elliott Mealer OL Wauseon, OH
    Brandon Moore TE Trotwood, OH

    Historical 1st Rounders (8 of 29)

    By far the best ratio is the historic 1st rounders from Michigan. This includes the only two Heisman trophy winners for Michigan during the NFL draft era.

    1972: Thom Darden, Michigan, DB
    1974: Dave Gallagher, Michigan, DT
    1975: Dave Brown, Michigan, DB
    1979: Jon Giesler, Michigan, T
    1987: Jim Harbaugh, Michigan, QB
    1991: Jarrod Bunch, Michigan, RB
    1992: Desmond Howard, Michigan, WR
    1998: Charles Woodson, Michigan, CB

    Current NFLers (4 out of 44)

    4 out of 44 is a pretty small number. I think the most surprising part is that not a single one of the many offensive lineman the Wolverines have in the pros came from the state of Ohio.

    Prescott Burgess Linebacker Baltimore Ravens
    Charles Woodson Cornerback Green Bay Packers
    Pierre Woods Linebacker New England Patriots
    B.J. Askew Fullback Tampa Bay Buccaneers

    Conclusion

    I don't know if there's really much you can take out of these numbers to be honest. Perhaps that Ohio has a lot of talent to go around, perhaps that some kids from Ohio don't grow up Buckeye fans. Really the numbers don't point to Michigan ever raiding Ohio for talent. 8 of 29 1st rounders is a big number, but in the overall current picture Ohio just seems like another Midwestern state for the Wolverines to target recruits.

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    The Scalabrine Watch Week 13

    This season the NBA has listened to one of my many thoguht and has started to track a players +/- during the course of individual games. Due to my dislike of Brian Scalabrine, I am going to track he's performance in a weekly post called The Scalabrine Watch. 3 Million a year for what?

    Celtics 112 Raptors 114: 8
    +8? Where the hell did that come from? In 12 minutes Scalabrine contributed 5 rebounds including 3 on the offensive end and he hit a three? Seriously? That's actually being productive while on the court.

    Game Stats: 12 Minutes, 1-2, 3 Points, 5 Rebounds, 0 Assists

    Celtics 87 Timberwolves 86: DNP

    Celtics 93 Magic 96: -4
    Obviously with the productive performance at the start of the week there needed to be something to counter balance that at some point. And yesterday it was counterbalanced alright. Due to the absence of Kevin Garnett, Doc started Scals and played him 22 minutes. Both were pretty dumb decisions obviously. In 22 minutes, only 2 minutes away from being on the court half the game, Scals only stat was a single rebound. Yes he played nearly half the game attempted and missed one shot and pulled down one singular offensive rebound. Meanwhile fellow bench warmer, Leon Powe, was in the game for 27 minutes and pulled down 9 boards and scored 9 points. Talk about a waste of minutes, 22 completely useless minutes.

    Game Stats: 22 Minutes, 0-1, 0 Points, 1 Rebound, 0 Assists

    Overall Week Performance: +4
    Scals somehow moves further away from the break even point with a week in the positive. This despite playing 22 minutes and doing absolutely positively nothing with his time on the court. Seriously it had to be one of the least statistical performances by a player who spent nearly half the game on the court in the history of the NBA.

    Weeks Stats: 34 Minutes, 1-3, 4 Points, 6 Rebounds, 0 Assists

    Overall Season Performance: +17
    Scals boosted his numbers slightly this week which is to be expected given the season high 5 rebounds he had against the Raptors and the 22 brilliant minutes he played against the Magic.

    Season Stats:9:41 MPG, .317 FG%, 1.9 PPG, 1.4 RPG, 0.7 APG

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    Investing in the Unknown

    Feel like investing in something completely chance? Well now you can apparently invest in the future earnings of a minor league baseball player. Purchase a share and you are entitled to a certain percentage of his salary. To be exact Randy Newsom is selling 4% of his potential major league earnings at a 50,000 clip. You can purchase an individual share for $20 dollars which will entitle you to .0016% of his future salary. So cause I'm a dork let's play with the numbers a little bit to find out what these investors are getting themselves into.

    Use simple math to deduct the break even point for both the investors and Randy.

    X * .04 = 50,000
    X = 50,000/.04 = 1,250,000

    Thus if Randy makes exactly a million and a quarter over his MLB than this whole investment is mute. No one wins no one lose everyone walks away with the same amount. Well except Randy walks away with the whole Time Value of money benefit but that's an economic's class for another time. Now the current Major League minimum salary is 390,000$, which is certainly a nice chunk of change, but in order to make it up to that break even point he's going to have to have atleast a little staying power.

    If we simplify the minimum salary and assume it goes up a tad and make the average minimum salary 400K we can figure out exactly how long he would need to be under a major league contract.

    1,250,000 / 400,000 = 3.125 years

    Again he's going to need at least some staying to make MLB. Now let's play with some potential numbers to see what life would be like for the investor if he played for a varient amount of years at a varient salary.

    1 Year, Minimum Salary: 390,000 * .000016 = 6.24 for a loss of 13.76 cents
    2 Years, 400K Average Salary: 800,000 * .000016 = 12.80 for a loss of 7.20
    4 Years, 500K Average Salary: 2,000,000 * .000016 = 32 for a gain of 12 dollars
    10 Years, 1 Million Average: 10,000,000 * .000016 = 160 for a gain of 140 dollars
    Arod's Big Contracts, 252 - 81 + 300: 471,000,000 * .000016 = 7,536 for a gain of 7,516 dollars

    Personally I think this is a solid decision by Newsom. The novelty of the idea will probably get him close to if not all of the desire 50,000K. And given the uncertainty of minor league prospects, his current ranking of 50th on the Indians prospect list and his position of Relief Submarine pitcher who throws in the low 80s, the odds of him playing in the majors for 3+ seasons is not very high.

    But just in case you feel the need to make a very risky and probably highly unprofitable investment, here's some video of him pitching against nobody.

    Posted by Simon at 10:42 AM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    The Bible Gives Me the Power I Need

    Not faith, but rather an avenue to end the stability of Tom Brady's right knee. Curious? Of Course you are.

    "Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." Matthew 18:19-20

    You see that right there? I don't even need an army or a Facebook group to get it done. I apparently only need one other person who really wants Tom Brady's right knee blown out. And as a bonus God will then make an appearance at my Super Bowl party. Sounds like a win-win to me.

    Posted by Simon at 9:06 AM 1 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    When Will White Kids Learn

    Saturday, January 26, 2008


    Jumping, even for something as simple as a Jump Shot, is not advisable.

    Courtesy of The Postmen

    Posted by Simon at 6:26 PM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    I Need an Answer to the Delonte Question

    Friday, January 25, 2008

    Ok seriously my buddies and I nicknamed Delonte West "Mystery Race" a long time ago but what the hell is this profile picture? Is getting lighter but the day? He looks like a teenage cancer patient in that picture. Once my buddies and I saw his mom on a telecast, and that didn't help at all. So someone answer the damn question? Is he more Sinbad, Carlos Mencia, Jose Canseco, or Martin Starr? I got to know.

    Posted by Simon at 7:11 PM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Me at EC

    I've done a miserable job of pointing out when I post on Epic Carnival the past few months. Anyway, I post on Fridays typically in the afternoons, and it typically is a satirical post in letter format. This week I wrote a letter from Chuck Knoblauch to Roger Clemens.

    You can see all my posts at EC here.

    Posted by Simon at 12:16 PM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Weekly Waste of Oxygen

    Sex with your sons teammates? The Ultimate Warrior is ok with it, as long as it isn't gay sex or even gay fake sex.

    1. The Ultimate Warrior - I'm really not surprised that the Ultimate Warrior is a scumbag, but to these depths? Seriously? Dude he wasn't even gay he just played a gay man, what the hell does that have to do with parenting? Plus you can be opposed to the idea of homosexuality that's fine it's your opinion, but does it seriously make that big of a difference in raising a child. And he wasn't even gay anyway. Ugh so stupid.

    2. Beth Modica - The idea of a hot mom having sex with her teenagers hockey teammates might sound appealing to some. But the idea of a not so hot Police Chiefs wife having sex and giving head to multiple players on her sons team in reality is pretty disgusting and gross. Really if you were a 16 year old I'm pretty sure the High School ass you could pull would be a lot more preferential than that.

    3. Urban Meyer - Mr. Meyer is certainly an interesting recruiter. First he calls a report to question whether a players ACT scores are legit given the players big jump from one score to the next. Why did he do it? Because he didn't commit to Florida of course. Also Meyer helps recruit players by getting their girlfriends scholarships as well as having Tim Tebow make phone calls. Both illegal.

    4. Dana Jacobson - She doesn't like Jesus apparently. I mean she's not exactly the only person on the planet who doesn't. Jesus Quintana was in fact a pedophile and mighty fine bowler, but he most definitely a dirt back. So I can see not liking him. And really who doesn't want to say Fuck Notre Dame ever now and then.

    Get Your Vote On

    Last Weeks Winner:
    Greg Paulus

    Posted by Simon at 11:46 AM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Friday Video Blowout

    Everyone needs something to keep them occupied on Friday afternoons so the Friday Video Blowout was born. Spend your next few minutes, laughing, crying of laughter, pissing your self, whatever, but mostly wasting your companies time.

    Videos In Order Courtesy of AA, adult swim * 2, Deadpsin, EC, Fanhouse, Wizard of Odds, CO-ED Magazine


    This is why Gus Johnson is the man.


    Carl happy once...


    Carl Happy Twice...


    Team Asia at it once again.


    Atleast they were destroying a shitty car.


    Yes a possible appearance in the Super Bowl.


    That screamed lotto commercial. Right?


    Don't trifle with the voting booth.

    Posted by Simon at 9:00 AM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    1st Rounders: UM vs. OSU

    Thursday, January 24, 2008

    One of the comments from the UM vs. OSU in the NFL post was curious as to which squad had more 1st round picks. Well fear not, I'm on it. The tracking i used only goes back to the 1970 merger which was plenty good for me.

    1970s 1st Rounders (23)

    1971: Jack Tatum, Ohio State, S
    1971: John Brockington, Ohio State, RB
    1971: Leo Hayden, Ohio State, RB
    1971: Tim Anderson, Ohio State, DB
    1972: Mike Taylor, Michigan, LB
    1972: Thom Darden, Michigan, DB
    1973: Paul Seymour, Michigan, TE
    1974: Dave Gallagher, Michigan, DT
    1974: John Hicks, Ohio State, G
    1974: Randy Gradishar, Ohio State, LB
    1974: Rick Middleton, Ohio State, LB
    1975: Dave Brown, Michigan, DB
    1975: Doug France, Ohio State, T
    1975: Kurt Shumacher, Ohio State, T
    1975: Neal Colzie, Ohio State, DB
    1976: Archie Griffin, Ohio State, RB
    1976: Tim Fox, Ohio State, DB
    1977: Bob Brudzinski, Ohio State, LB
    1978: Chris Ward, Ohio State, T
    1978: John Anderson, Michigan, LB
    1978: Mike Kenn, Michigan, T
    1979: Jon Giesler, Michigan, T
    1979: Tom Cousineau, Ohio State, LB

    1980s 1st Rounders (9)

    1980: Curtis Greer, Michigan, DE
    1981: Mel Owens, Michigan, LB
    1982: Butch Woolfork, Michigan, RB
    1984: William Roberts, Ohio State, T
    1985: Jim Lachey, Ohio State, T
    1985: Kevin Brooks, Michigan, DE
    1986: Keith Byars, Ohio State, RB
    1987: Jim Harbaugh, Michigan, QB
    1988: Eric Krumerow, Ohio State, DE

    1990s 1st Rounders (24)

    1991: Jarrod Bunch, Michigan, RB
    1991: Vinnie Clark, Ohio State, DB
    1992: Alonzo Spellman, Ohio State, DE
    1992: Desmond Howard, Michigan, WR
    1993: Robert Smith, Ohio State, RB
    1993: Steve Everitt, Michigan, C
    1994: Dan Wilkinson, Ohio State, DT
    1994: Derrick Alexander, Michigan, WR
    1995: Craig Powell, Ohio State, LB
    1995: Joey Galloway, Ohio State, WR
    1995: Korey Stringer, Ohio State, T
    1995: Trezelle Jenkins, Michigan, OL
    1995: Ty Law, Michigan, CB
    1995: Tyrone Wheatley, Michigan, RB
    1996: Eddie George, Ohio State, RB
    1996: Rickey Dudley, Ohio State, TE
    1996: Terry Glenn, Ohio State, NE
    1996: Tim Biakabutuka, Michigan, RB
    1997: Orlando Pace, Ohio State, T
    1997: Shawn Springs, Ohio State, CB
    1998: Charles Woodson, Michigan, CB
    1999: Andy Katzenmoyer, Ohio State, LB
    1999: Antoine Winfield, Ohio State, DB
    1999: David Boston, Ohio State, WR

    2000s 1st Rounders (20)

    2000: Ahmed Plummer, Ohio State, CB
    2001: David Terrell, Michigan, WR
    2001: Jeff Backus, Michigan, T
    2001: Nate Clements, Ohio State, CB
    2001: Ryan Pickett, Ohio State, DT
    2001: Steve Hutchinson, Michigan, G
    2004: Chris Gamble, Ohio State, CB
    2004: Chris Perry, Michigan, RB
    2004: Michael Jenkins, Ohio State, WR
    2004: Will Smith, Ohio State, DE
    2005: Braylon Edwards, Michigan, WR
    2005: Marlin Jackson, Michigan, CB
    2006: A. J. Hawk, Ohio State, LB
    2006: Bobby Carpenter, Ohio State, LB
    2006: Donte Whitner, Ohio State, S
    2006: Nick Mangold, Ohio State, C
    2006: Santonio Holmes, Ohio State, WR
    2007: Anthony Gonzalez, Ohio State, WR
    2007: Leon Hall, Michigan, CB
    2007: Ted Ginn, Ohio State, WR

    Total 1st Rounders (76)

    Michigan (29): 1970s (8), 1980s (5), 1990s (9), 2000s (7), Current Pros (8)

    Ohio St. (47): 1970s (15), 1980s (4), 1990s (15), 2000s (13), Current Pros (17)

    Conclusion

    Complete Domination for Ohio St. With the exception of a very weak 1980s for both schools the Buckeyes have pummeled the Wolverines when it comes to first round draft picks. This leads to a few possible conclusions. Given Michigan's better current pros, it would seem like the Wolverines do a worse job at both developing and promoting talent than the Buckeyes. That when the Wolverines players reach the NFL that's when they truly blossom into great talents, see Tom Brady. Doesn't make you feel good about the talent utilization by the old coaching staff.

    Meanwhile, the Buckeyes have 9 more 1st round draft picks in the NFL currently than the Wolverines yet only 4 more total players and less success in the pros. This makes you think the exact opposite about the Buckeyes. They seemingly get their players ready for prime time prior to departure. The past two drafts in which the Buckeyes had 7 1st round picks to the Wolverines one makes it pretty easy to explain the current losing streak.

    Posted by Simon at 3:37 PM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    The Chauvinistic Male Approach to Tennis: Sharapova vs. Ivanovic

    In every sporting event there is a typical process to determine who to root for. Are you a fan of one of the teams or players? Do you despise one of the players? Is one a significantly better story or a significant underdog? etc. Well my rule for Womens Tennis is pretty simple and straight forward. I root for who I find more attractive. Sure it's complete Chauvinism but whatever I'm admitting to it. I want to watch the attractive ones play much more than I want to see butch male types play. And thus I now plan on having posts for the semifinals and finals of all the grand slams tournaments to vote on which the public would rather see win.

    Maria Sharapova vs. Ana Ivanovic

    A Rematch of a Poll from Last Year when Ivanovic pulled a surprising upset. Can Sharapova return the favor?





    More Sharapova Pics, More Ivanovic Pics

    Posted by Simon at 11:08 AM 1 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Al Jefferson Exposes Phoenix

    Over the past few years I've rooted for the Phoenix Suns in the playoffs. I've hoped that their offense would carry them over their opponents despite their woes on defense. I've hoped that they could simply outscore their opponents, but it just hasn't happened and it just isn't going to happen. The Phoenix Suns are going to meet a similar demise as they have in past seasons for the simple reason that they are so easily dominated by an opposing big man.

    Case in Point my former Celtic Man Crush, Al Jefferson. Jefferson this season has developed into the go to guy for one of the worst teams in the league. His numbers are solid (20 & 12) but they are obviously at least slightly bloated given the fact the rest of his roster is piss poor. However against the Suns this season Al Jefferson morphs into a Hall of Fame Center.

    Last night the Timberwolves defeated the Suns for the second time this season 117-107, despite Amare's 33 point effort. Why? Mostly because the Suns were completely ineffective in stopping the young big man. Big Al scored a career high 39 points while pulling down 15 rebounds including 8 offensive boards. Not only were the Suns unable to stop Big Al in the post but apparently they can't box out. 8 offensive rebounds? Put a body on the big man.

    In the other two games against the Suns Jefferson has been similarly dominant. In the Timberwolves first win over the Suns Jefferson was an absolute beast on the boards pulling down 20 including 6 offensive boards. Jefferson also piled in 32 points on the Suns in the T-Wolves 100-93 win. In Phoenix's lone win against the Timberwolves they did a better job of slowing down Jefferson but still only to an all star level performance as Jefferson had 27 points and 14 rebounds.

    Simply put the Timberwolves are a horrendous team with one potentially All Star level talent in Big Al. The Timberwolves are 7-34 for that exact reason yet the Suns, who came into the game with the best record in the Western Conference, struggle mightily to defeat them. Their roster is not constructed to even slow down a talented big man and once again come playoff time they will fail for this exact reason.

    Posted by Simon at 9:27 AM 1 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    A Lengthy Bicycle Kick


    Hmm I'm about 40 yards away from goal so... what the hell why not try a bicycle kick.

    Courtesy of Who Ate All the Pies

    Posted by Simon at 9:12 AM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Stephen A Thinks All Your URLs Are Belong to Stephen A

    Wednesday, January 23, 2008


    For those questioning the legitimacy of Stephen A's blog I transcribed his radio conversation from today where he divulged his new website to his 3 non deaf listeners. Also you can listen to it here while it's still up on his 1050 page. The divulgance is at the 9:50 mark. Anyway here's the transcript.

    Stephen A: Mike did I tell you I got my own website?

    Mikey Miss: Ya I heard about that.

    Stephen A: StephenA.commmmm

    Mikey Miss: How about that?

    Stephen A: You know read my blog, I'm gonna write a weekly blog. I got my own email address. My own guest list. All that stuff. My events. You know what I'm saying. My bio. All of that stuff. I decided, my family convinced me to do it. So I decided to do it. StephenA.com. You know I had to fight for months to get ownership of my own daggone name. Somebody else got StephenASmith.com. I had to get StephenA.com It that ridiculous.

    Mikey Miss: Common Name

    Stephen A: That's Ridiculous. No people were doing it and holding onto it so they could make money off of me.

    Mikey Miss: You didn't buy it back?

    Stephen A: I had to buy it back for 5 but I only paid 500 dollar, they tried to charge me like 20 thousand. I was like you must be on drugs I was gonna sue em. But than I said to expedite the process [mumbles] you take it for 500 dollars, I'll give you the 500 dollars that's all your getting. That's what I ended up doing. To get my name. MY NAME. MINE. ITS RIDICULOUS. I was ready to sue em. You know there's laws against that. Don't Get me started with the court system. [Typical Radio Sign Off]


    So that last paragraph was quality. Stephen A's name is his and only his and all your URLS are belong to him. And apparently he's already late in making his second post for his 'weekly blog'. Good Luck Mr. Smith.

    Posted by Simon at 8:45 PM 1 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    I Thought Stephen A Hated Blogs


    Maybe it was a discussion with Big Mouth Salisbury that got him to reconsider, but former journalist/big mouth/talking head Stephen A. Smith has now ventured into the blogging world. The very same media stream you said 'should not be allowed to disseminate information' is now you're lone outlet for penning your babble.

    Oh what irony Stephen A. You criticize those like me and then within a month come and join the pack with your very own website. Thus far there is only a singular post penned on Stephen's blog, which simply put is horribly formatted and all over the place. Here's hoping that in the very near future Stephen includes personal photos of himself eating cheese doodles in sock puppet form. That should help him earn some blogger credibility.

    'EVERYTHING I SAY IS IMPORTANT'

    Note 2: Here is a transcription of his divulgence if you are a skeptic.

    Note 1: For those that for some reason think its fake, I found out about the website from listening to his radio show. (Yes I desire to go deaf). Stephen A and his partner are on for 2 hours in NYC not just the single national hour. During the NYC only hour Missanelli said that Stephen A had a website and Stephen A mentioned it and started complaining about people owning the naming rights. Additional he made statements similar to his blog post about not ever wanting a website but his family telling him he should have one. So unless he lies on his own show, not that doubtful, its a real blog and real site.

    Posted by Simon at 2:57 PM 3 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Why Couldn't You Have Fled for the Sidelines?


    Why did you have to be a tough guy Drew? Why couldn't you have done what most normal pussy quarterbacks do and slide or step out of bounds? Was that first down really that important to you? If so shouldn't you have tried to dive for the first down? Mo Lewis is a big boy, you're a quarterback, you had no shot of running him over. You certainly should have known that.

    What the hell were you thinking?

    Posted by Simon at 2:47 PM 3 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    Have Tennis Organizers Never Watched March Madness?


    If you quickly glance and the above bracket it looks perfectly normal. The 1 seed faces off a against a 5 seed and a 3 seed faces a 7 seed. If you saw that in the NCAA tournament your thought process would read, hmm I guess the #2 seed got upset early. But take a closer look. If you look at the labels above the designated matchups you will see a miss match. The 1 seed faces the 5 seed in the quarterfinals, shouldn't that be the semis? And then it hits you, that's not the entire draw, that's simply the top portion of the Women's draw. The top portion which is quite obviously more difficult than anything that could be constructed in the lower portion of the bracket. Why? Because the only thing that isn't random in a Tennis Draw is the separation of the #1 and #2 seeds.

    Perhaps I'm a stickler for organization and common sense, but what the hell is wrong with the typical NCAA tournament-esque bracket. What's wrong with the 4 and 5 seed facing each other in the quarterfinals, the 1 seed facing the winner of that match in the semifinals and then facing the winner of the 2 vs. 3 match in the finals. Shouldn't their be some sort of benefit towards being the best player on the planet? Shouldn't those that are not the best player have to go over additional hurdles to win a Major Tournament.

    In the Men's Draw there is again another poor consequence to randomness. Obviously the favorite for the Australian Open was/is Roger Federer. He's the favorite for everything not in the country of France. But for those not overly familiar with tennis the #2 choice for odds makers was not Rafael Nadal but rather 20 year old Serbian Novak Djokovic. Djokovic is making his 4th consecutive Grand Slam semifinal appearance including a finals loss to Federer at the US Open and is currently #3 in the world. So logic would say he would face Nadal in the semifinals for the opportunity to face Federer in the finals. But of course logic is wrong. Nadal if he can get by a Frenchman will await the winner of the 2 tournament favorites.

    Perhaps my thought process of saving the best for last is wrong but to me structure is certianly better than unfair chaos.

    Posted by Simon at 10:16 AM 0 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    The Chauvinistic Male Approach to Tennis:Hantuchova vs. Ivanovic

    In every sporting event there is a typical process to determine who to root for. Are you a fan of one of the teams or players? Do you despise one of the players? Is one a significantly better story or a significant underdog? etc. Well my rule for Womens Tennis is pretty simple and straight forward. I root for who I find more attractive. Sure it's complete Chauvinism but whatever I'm admitting to it. I want to watch the attractive ones play much more than I want to see butch male types play. And thus I now plan on having posts for the semifinals and finals of all the grand slams tournaments to vote on which the public would rather see win.

    Daniela Hantuchova vs. Ana Ivanovic




    Posted by Simon at 9:49 AM 1 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!

    UM vs. OSU in the NFL

    A reader Michael (I have readers?) sent in a request for me to analyze the Michigan and Ohio St. NFLers. And since I don't ever get requests I figured what the hell why not. So without further ado onto the breakdown. Here's the list I'm working off if you have disputes.

    Definite Hall of Famers

    Michigan (1) - Tom Brady, Three going on Four Time Superbowl Champion amidst the greatest season for a Quarterback in the history of the league.

    Ohio St. (1) - Orlando Pace, As a 7 time Pro Bowler and amongst the best left tackles of all time I imagine that Orlando Pace will be a a no doubt Hall of Famer.

    Edge: MICHIGAN, Orland Pace is a great NFL player but Tom Brady isn't very far from becoming the greatest quarterback in NFL history.

    Potential Hall of Famers

    Michigan (2) - Steve Hutchinson, Ty Law - Steve Hutchinson has been the single most dominant guard in football for the past five years helping pave the way for Shaun Alexander and Purple Jesus. While it is very difficult to get into the Hall of Fame as a guard Hutchinson case could be made. For Ty Law he has 5 Pro Bowls to his credit, a lot of ints and some shiny jewelry on his fingers.

    Ohio St. (1) - Mike Vrabel - Vrabel is a definitive stretch for the Hall of Fame as he's only made the Pro Bowl once (this season) however he does have an abundant amount of Super Bowl rings.

    Edge: MICHIGAN, all three probably won't get in, but two stretches is better than one.

    Pro Bowlers

    Michigan (9 players making 23 appearances) - Tom Brady (4), Steve Hutchinson (5), Ty Law (5), Charles Woodson (4), Jon Runyan (1), Brian Griese (1), Cato June (1), Ian Gold (1), Braylon Edwards (1) - A few of the players here are surprising. Brian Griese and Ian Gold made Pro Bowls you're probably asking yourself. Yep, both went to the game once a piece.

    Ohio St. (7 players making 16 appearances) - Orlando Pace (7), Nate Clements (2), LeCharles Bentley (2), Terry Glenn (1), Shawn Springs (2), Mike Vrabel (1), Will Smith (1) - With all the players for Ohio St. in the NFL now it's surprising that only 7 have ever played in the Pro Bowl game.

    Edge: MICHIGAN, both in total players and total appearances the Wolverines have it. Additionally it's surprising that neither Amani Toomer nor Joey Galloway have ever been selected to a Pro Bowl.

    Total Rosters Infiltrated

    Michigan (25) - Michigan is represented on 25 of the NFL teams in the league including all 12 of the playoff teams. The largest collector of Wolverines is the Steelers with 5.

    Ohio St. (26) - The Buckeyes meanwhile are represented on 26 of the 32 NFL teams. This includes 10 of the playoff squads with Jacksonville as well as the NFC Champion New York Giants not being represented. The largest collector of Buckeyes are the Panthers with 4.

    Edge: PUSH, Ohio St. as more reps total while Michigan has more playoff as well as both Super Bowl teams represented.

    Overall Players

    Michigan (44) - Michigan has 44 players in the NFL which isn't too shabby, but not enough to beat the Buckeyes.

    Ohio St. (48) - The Buckeyes take the final category with a 4 player edge over the Wolverines.

    Edge: OHIO STATE, the numbers don't lie.

    Conclusion: Quality Over Quantity

    Ohio St. currently has more players on NFL rosters however that's where their advantage over Michigan ends. Michigan has more potential Hall of Famers and more Pro Bowlers than does Ohio St. Additionally a Michigan representative will be rewarded a ring no matter what the outcome is on Super Bowl sunday.

    Winner: MICHIGAN

    Feel free to disagree in the comments.

    UPDATE: One of the Commenter's was interested in seeing which school put together more 1st round draft picks. I obliged and posted it here. as the commenter suggested, it puts a completely different spin on things.

    UPDATE 2: Mr. Biased Ohio St. fan that yelled at me about the Pro Bowls, I added up total appearances for you and Michigan has 7 more total appearances so your math which you didn't do was wrong.

    UPDATE 3: I got a request to put together a list of the Wolverines from Ohio which you can read here.

    Posted by Simon at 8:39 AM 24 comments Links to this post   Digg! submit to reddit BallHype: hype it up!
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